What If? The Darkest Possiblitys
by ShadowAngelJen
Summary: What if a DigiDesteined had a bond so strong with their partner, it ment the world to them? What if this bond was shattered..What if their Digimon Partner, died, and there was no possiblity of rebirth? What if, the DD so consumed by grief, fell to darknes
1. Default Chapter

If you get scared, don't read this please.  
  
Its pg-13 for violence, and blood, and death.  
  
People remembered when I wrote that Alternative messed up demon story? (darkest time) well this is another ..WHAT if the future turned out differently.   
  
Only..its way more disturbing.  
  
First thing, this is based on this Digimon Rpg I go to. The people in the story, most, are DD's or Enemys. This is based on my chari. from this rpg, and WHAT if things turned out diffrently, and dark. (I am not evil, lol I am good, but in this story, its what if?)   
  
Basicly its what if my char. in this rpg (whos a DigiDesteined) did NOT get her partner back. (Vegeta-Megidramon is my partner, he died, but got resurrected) And what if she turned to darkness, because of this.  
  
I decided to go deep within my psych. and try and figure out, what I would of been like, had Vegeta not been restored, had I not gotten sane.. what if my anger, hatred, pain consumed me so completely..I went completely insane and dark?   
  
Also QUICK note-For those who know Duskmon, and Velgmon, you will note, there are differences between the one you know, and the one in my story. I know tis. Duskmon, in my story, I wished to make different then the Duskmon on the show.For example, Duskmon's blades (in this story) Are detachable (like real swords) and are NOT red, they are more, bone white.  
  
Without Further Ado,   
  
Read, if you dare. Disturbing, it is.  
  
==============   
  
Chapter 1-Digital World, Home no Longer.  
  
I raise my head to the sky, the sun shinning brightly down on my face. The sun.. So bright.. What right did it have to shine so brightly? Why was it so happy? I close my eyes, the sun beating down on my face. Flash's of images shoot though my mind. Being chased..Running though darkness.. A huge white globe, bearing down. The roar of pain, from my partner...as his life ended. Screams of others, all to brief, before ending. Darkness again. Then red, blood red rain streaming down. The images.. Some real, Some imagined, Some I did not know. Real. Not real. Did it mater anymore, what images was real or not? They all carried the same feelings. The same pain. The same loneness. The same heat. They consumed me day and night. My dreams, were nightmares, my waking moments, eternal pain. To end such pain.. What would i not give? But the pain, never ended. Only one way, did I ever find, to ease it, even if it was ever so briefly. With my eyes still closed, I grasp my D-Tector, moving it to my heart. I feel it burning...I feel the burning need to transform..to become not me.  
  
"Spirit Evolutoin Activate!"  
  
Dark energy surrounds me, I tilt my head up higher, letting the dark spirit cover me, consume me. My body transforms, becomes that of a dark warrior, and when the digivolution energy fades, a Feminine Duskmon stands in the bright sunlight. I open my eyes..my cold red eyes.  
  
The sunlight, dose not seem so bright, and cheerful now. It seems more like burning fire.. The same fire that consumes my soul. I wish, I could bring that fire down, that burns so brightly in space,so all may feel, what I feel inside. I stand there, for a few more minutes, but my thoughts start to wander, I start thinking of him.. my partner.. Who never really had a chance. I push those thoughts aside, and leap into the air. My eyes scout the plain, and in the distance, I see my prey. I land, on the ground, and smirk a bit, then begun running. I run though the grass, and soon my eyes fall on the Goatmon ahead of me. I continue running, drawing my swords out, to my side. The Goatmon looks up, and raises his hooves, he starts to run, far to late. I leap into the air.  
  
"Swords of Darkness!"  
  
The Goatmon looks at me, I feel its fear, vibrating, time seems to slow down, I hover above the Goatmon, slowly my swords move stretch down, as I slowly fall to the terrified Goatmon. And then, a flash of red and blue streak past, restoring time."  
  
"Fire Rocket!"  
  
The attack hits me, sending me tumbling into the grass. A Flamedramon lands near me. It looks at the Goatmon.  
  
Flamedramon:"Run."  
  
Goatmon turns, without a word, and flees. I leap up, facing the Flamedramon, my eyes, duskmon's eyes, start to glow.  
  
Another voice, comes to me, pleading almost.  
  
"Don't do this, Please."  
  
I turn my head, to see..him. He who has followed me ever since I abandoned the others. Set out on my own. He's never given up trying.  
  
"Leave me in peace."  
  
He looks at me, his eyes angry, but sad.  
  
"Peace? You are slaughtering Digimon, Innocent Digimon. What kind of peace can that bring, Jen?"  
  
I growl and turn my eyes, back to Flamedramon.  
  
"What peace, can I have? I lost everything. You cannot understand me, Dave. LEAVE ME ALONE!"  
  
Dave:"You did not loose everything! We are still here, your friends."  
  
"I did. My hole world, shattered. Vegeta..."  
  
I close my eyes..remembering the night I woke up in that other realm, Woken up, by a pain so severe, and so deep, the shattering of the bond, I and my partner, Vegeta the Megidramon had.  
  
Dave:"Jen.."  
  
I open my eyes again.  
  
"The darkness.. Has chased me. It hurt me. They took my partners away from me, Vegeta.. They struck at me.. The darkness consumed me. The pain.. is like red hot knifes, the anger, like burning flames."  
  
Dave:"Let us ease your pain, Jen. We can help you. Its not to late."  
  
I roar, Flamedramon jumps.  
  
"It is! Get that though your head! The only way to ease my pain, is to make others feel it!"  
  
Dave;"You can't believe that!"  
  
"How many Digimon, must fall, before you realize, I DON'T CARE anymore about them? About you, about anyone. I tried to care, tried to save, I fought for this world, suffered for it. And how was I repaid? With the death of my partners, with the death of VEGETA! He meant the hole world to me. All I did, All I helped, for nothing. All it got me was pain. Pain that never eases, pain that burns deeper by the day."  
  
Dave:"Jen! Please.."  
  
I glare at him, and strike the ground with my sword.  
  
"STOP CHASING ME! LEAVE ME ALONE!"  
  
Dave:"I cannot. You are my friend, and for that reason, and because you hurt Digimon, I cannot, Jen."  
  
"And what will you do, if I don't stop? I can't. Its the only thing that eases my pain."  
  
Dave:"Jen. Don't make me do this."  
  
I raise my swords to the sky, Flamedramon crouches, ready to spring on Dave's orders.  
  
"Slide Evolution! Velgamon!"  
  
My wings spreed out as I take to the air, a dark cloud, passes over the sun. I circle the ground below.  
  
Dave:"JEN!"  
  
"Face it. You lost me. You chase after a person, that dose not exist anymore. The demons saw to that! They destroyed my partners. They chased me, Attacked me. Brought the moon down..Which killed Vegeta."  
  
Dave;"The demons are gone, Jen. Let your Digimon's spirits rest in peace, end this."  
  
I glare down at Dave.  
  
"You betrayed me, to! You all did! You KNEW Vegeta would not make it, you KNEW! Yet you did not even tell me, when we went into the void, to the other world, that he would not make it. That he would DIE! NONE of you had the courage, or Honor to tell me! You should of, I could of saved him!"  
  
Dave:"Jen. No one could. He was far to deep, in demon territory. There was nothing you could of done. We mearly.. Wanted to ease your pain..."  
  
I scream, a hellish sound, that echos throughout the Digital World.  
  
"EASE MY PAIN?? YOU ONLY DEEPENDED IT!!"  
  
More storm clouds gather and I circle Dave and Flamedramon, my wings glowing.  
  
Dave:"Jen, NO!"  
  
Flamedramon jumps toward Dave, as energy pierces the ground all around them.  
  
"ZONE DELETER!!!!"  
  
I start to fire it, Flamedramon dives, covering Dave, then my eyes go to his.. I feel.. No..its OF THE PAST such emotions.only hurt..GO AWAY!   
  
I scream again, Thoughts.. of I can't hurt him, or kill him..flash though my head...and the atttack stops, I stop it..before it can hit the two below, the energy from the attack explodes in midair, the shock-wave hits me, hard, I feel myself DeDigivovle, and then I scream as everything goes black. 


	2. Chapter 2Just a girl? If Only That Was S...

Chapter 2-Just a girl? If Only That Was So.  
  
6 months later.  
  
I pull my hood up around my head, looking around the corner. Seeing no one, I quickly walk, keeping the hood tightly around my head. A piece of paper drifts in the wind. I look upward, the lights of the city blinding me. Real World. Full of pain. Just like the Digital World. I remember 6 months ago. The attack, the Shock-wave, which pushed me here. I pause, my mistake, as footsteps approach me.  
  
"Hey, you! Stop right there! Let me look at you."  
  
I slowly turn, seeing a police officer, glaring at me. I slowly take off my coat, dropping it to the ground. I take out my D-Tector, gripping it tightly.  
  
Officer:"You! drop your weapon."  
  
I eye the police officer, and growl, then quickly, slash my D-Tector across my hand, transforming into Duskmon. The Officer looks shocked at me, and starts firing. I leap, landing nimbly behind him.  
  
"..."  
  
My eyes glow, and I raise my sword, and plunge it though his back. I hear him let out a small gurgle, as blood spurts onto my blades, and the sidewalk. I withdraw my sword, and he falls.   
  
I look at the blood, crimson black in the night, for a few long moments. Red..Crimson. All I need, all that eases the deep pain inside. Blood, is my drug. It is what allows me to escape the pain, even if its ever so briefly.   
  
Another pair of footsteps approach, then halt. I turn my head to see a women, her eyes are wide, staring at the fallen officer, then at me. She shakes, as if to scared to move.  
  
"Your afraid. Afraid of this dark warrior?"  
  
Lady:"y..y..your a murder..."  
  
I look at her, then with a flash, De-Spirit evolve.  
  
"...it eases my pain."  
  
The lady stares in shock at me.  
  
Lady:"Your...just a girl.."  
  
"Just a girl? How I wish that was so. To just be a girl, who never went though hell.. Who never suffered so."  
  
My eyes, grow slightly clouded, as the lady, and the blood soaked ground fade from my view, the sounds of the city, and the lady's frightened words, fade to nothingness..and soon all is covered by blackness.  
  
I find myself, leaning against a wall, in a deserted building some time later. I give my surroundings only the most brief of glances, used to these blackouts, that occur after I ... I still cannot say it even to myself. Can't bring myself to give words, for what I do. For what I have done. I look at my hand, expecting to see crimson red blood, but its clean. Its aways clean. Its the swords, of Duskmon, that are stained with blood. I slowly slump to the ground, my eyes fluttering. I shake my head, trying to stay awake, but I feel myself drifting off. I've been up, what is it this time, 4 days, 5? I loose track. Sleep..is my enemy. Sleep...brings back the memory's I have long since, tried to bury in these six months. Despite my efforts, sleep claims me, this night.  
  
Flash's of red, a roar, both fierce, and gentle. I look up, and see him, Vegeta, my partner. He smiles at me, then starts to slowly move away. I scream, and run after him, but the faster I run, the faster he moves away from me. And then, a brilliant white flash, blinding, I feel the pain, rip though me. The pain of ever single cell in my body being destroyed, one after another. Only its not my pain, its Vegeta's. And then, the second pain comes. Piercing, like a blade of of liquid fire. Piercing my soul, ripping part of it away forever. I scream, endlessly, the darkness grows around me, then consumes me. Crimson rain falls, it smells like Vegeta, and like my other fallen partners. White flashes swirl around, moaning can be heard. Its your fault...You should of saved us... you should of died instead. Then I see Vegeta, a faint blur.   
  
Vegeta:"Why did you not save me? I thought you loved me.."  
  
"I did! VEGETA, I'm sorry! Its my fault..I should of saved you, I should of been able to!"  
  
Vegeta vanishes once again, and I scream, and the shadows swirl around me, shadows of my friends, of people of Digimon. They shriek at me.  
  
Shadows:"Why did you kill us?? Why?? Duskmon!!!!!"  
  
"I never killed my friends! I.."  
  
Shadows:"But you've killed...others..."  
  
"You don't understand! It EASES my pain, I can't Bear it!"  
  
The shadows shriek at me again, and then surround me consuming my flesh, and bones.  
  
I wake up with a start, barely muffling a scream. I shake, shivering in the cool damp air. I clench my hands putting them to my forehead.  
  
"SHUT UP! Go away! I just want to forget, why can't I just forget!?"  
  
I clench my eyes, I won't let myself cry. I won't be weak. Vegeta... NO, I won't think of him..Hes dead, his memory only brings me pain. I clench my fists tighter, until my fingernails break the skin, blood trickles down my palms, dripping on my arms. I clench my fingernails tighter, letting the pain, sweep away the nightmare. I slowly stand up a few minutes later, and walk to one of the broken windows. I look outside, dawn has yet to break. I have slept, only a few hours. I barely sleep..I can't. The nightmares wake me up, so intense, I cannot fall asleep.   
  
"why won't these memory's fade..why won't the pain ease.."  
  
I walk to the door, and look out, and sigh. I should get something to eat. I feel dizzy. But the very thought of food makes me nauseous. I don't eat much. Food gives me no pleasure, it seems pointless.. as dose everything else. I sigh, softly, and walk into the night. 


	3. Chapter 3The Faintest of Sparks, Ever Fl...

Chapter 3-The Faintest of Sparks, Ever Fleeting  
  
The sounds of distant sirens, pierce the air. I snarl, disliking the shrill sound. Suddenly, I stop. The sent of blood, drifts in the wind. I look down a ally, and see the women, I saw earlier this night.   
  
"Di..Did I kill her? I don't remember."  
  
I slowly walk down the ally, and look at her, poking the cold, still body with my shoe. Her head, falls backward, a gaping hole in her head. I look up, seeing her brains splattered against the concrete wall. Gunshot wound. Probably a mugging. I shrug, and leave the ally, then stop, and look around.  
  
"Pain. Death. Not only I feel these."  
  
I close my eyes, listening to the city awaken. The honking of horns, people arising in there apartment's. I spread my arms, as if they were wings.  
  
"Velgamon.."  
  
How easy it would be, to become, my beast spirit. To level this city, to destroy everyone in it. Would that ease there pain? Would it ease mine? Why don't I? Why don't I just destroy everything?  
  
~Your as bad as me, Shadow~  
  
I twist around, looking, before I realize, the words are just memory's, spoken by another, long ago. By a demon. I wonder, am I like her? Was she so right about me? No. She could not be. I could not destroy everything. Or could I? My thoughts, drift, though dark corridors of my mind. I don't know what I am doing. Why I am continuing to live. It seems pointless. I could end my pain, so easily. But maybe I could not. Why should I? Why should I cease to exist, just to ease others pain? My pain, would follow me, past death. There is no peace for me, I know that. I failed to save, the one I loved most of all. My actions destroyed him. Destroyed my other partners. And I have..Duskmon has taken life's. There is no fields of endless green, for one such as I. Only pain. So, I exist. I slowly blink, then lower my arms and move away from the ally.  
  
I wander for a few hours, walking though the darker parts of the city streets, trying not to think. Trying not to feel. I wish I could just deaden my emotions..destroy them.  
  
"Why"  
  
A voice asks me.  
  
I jerk my head up, unawares I had spoken aloud. My eyes pierce the night, my hand moves inside my coat, to my D-Tector.  
  
Voice:"Now ease up, no need for weapons."  
  
A boy walks out, and faces me, I study him. He can't be more then 15. His cloths are ragged, and dirty.  
  
"Go away."  
  
I turn from him, and continue walking, realizing my hand is still on my D-Tector. Part of me wishes to Spirit Evolve. Wishes to kill. Duskmon...  
  
Boy:"Hey, wait!"  
  
His footsteps patter after me, I frown.  
  
"I said, leave me alone."  
  
Boy:"You.. You just looked hungry or something. I was going to show you a place, free food. But if you want to be left alone, fine."  
  
He turns, and walks off, and strangely, I find myself turning and following him. Something about his voice. I follow him to a small building, he enters, and after a few moments, I follow him.  
  
Boy:"Thought you were hungry. Sit down. I'll get us some chow!"  
  
I look at the few people, scattered between tables, eating. I pull my hood around me, and sit in the corner. Why am I here. There is no point. Then again, there is no point to anything. The boy returns, setting two plates down, he starts eating. I slowly pick up the plastic fork, turning it in the light, then poke the food.  
  
Boy:"Don't you eat?"  
  
I shrug slightly, still not speaking, I slowly pick at my food. I eat a few bites, then push the rest toward the boy.  
  
Boy:"Thats it?"  
  
"I don't eat much."  
  
Boy:"My names Jerry. You?"  
  
I look at him, for a moment I consider not answering, then for another moment, I consider transforming to Duskmon. Duskmon... Aways on my mind. I sigh softly.  
  
"Jen."  
  
Jerry:"So, whats your story?"  
  
I look at him, eyes narrow.  
  
"None of your business."  
  
I get up, and turn my back on him. My D-Tector, seems to burn me.. the spirit of darkness seems to wish me to transform, to destroy, to kill. But is that the Spirit talking, or my own desires to ease my own pain? I walk out the door, ignoring the footsteps that run after me.  
  
Jerry:"Jen, I'm sorry. I forget others don't want to talk sometimes. Guess some people's life's, suck worse them mine. "  
  
I stop.  
  
"You..Know much pain, in your life?"  
  
Jerry:"My dad, well he was one of those who'd beat up anyone smaller then him. My brother used to defend me and my mom, but Dad hurt him, real bad.He almost died. He ran away."  
  
His voice turns angry.  
  
Jerry:"He left me, and my mom. And she died cause he did! After that, I ran away. Got no place to go."  
  
"He should die."  
  
Jerry's head jerks up.  
  
Jerry:"Who??"  
  
"Your Father."  
  
Jerry:"Hey, I hate him, and think he should be punished, but killing? Thats wrong."  
  
I turn my head slightly, looking at him.  
  
"Who's to say, what is right, and what is wrong?"  
  
Jerry:"I..Don't know. But it feels wrong to me, you know?"  
  
I turn my head away.  
  
"I don't know. Whats right, whats wrong. Those have been lost to shadows, to me. As well as many other things. If something eases, ones pain, should one not do, what helps them?"  
  
Jerry slowly backs away a few steps.  
  
Jerry:"What.. Have you done something like.. bad?"  
  
I shrug, and start to walk away, slowly.  
  
"Bad things happen. You try to help, and you end up hurt. Hurt so badly inside, the pain feels never ending. You wish to make others feel your pain. Somehow, this consumes. Till all that is left, is shadows."  
  
I stop speaking, why am I telling him this? Why?  
  
Jerry:"You .. Can't believe that. There is hope. I mean, not much, but I still have a bit of it."  
  
"I don't. Hope was destroyed for me, as well as so much more, when he was taken from me. My partner. Vegeta."  
  
Jerry runs down to me, and puts his hand on my arm. I shrug it off.  
  
Jerry:"He was killed?"  
  
I slowly nod.  
  
"I did everything to try and save my friends, the Digital World. In the end, I was replayed with pain. With his loss. I see no point, to anything anymore"  
  
Jerry is silent, as if not knowing what to say. Or maybe he thinks I am crazy, talking of another world.  
  
Jerry:"Can't you just..Get over it?"  
  
I look at him, my gaze cold, sad.  
  
"Can you forget about your Brother, your Mother? Dose the pain, ever ease?"  
  
Jerry looks down.  
  
Jerry:"I ..guess not. But in time"  
  
"Time. The pain never eases for me. Its ever burning. Deeper every day. Vegeta was so much apart of me..Part of me was eternally destroyed when he died."  
  
Jerry:"I..I'm sorry..but Pain? What do you mean, make others feel?"  
  
"I can't help it. It eases the pain. Making others feel, suffer. Duskmon makes them suffer. I have the power, to destroy this city."  
  
Jerry looks at me, its clear he thinks I am insane. And hes prob right. Just not in the way he's thinking.  
  
Jerry:"Why don't you?"  
  
I shrug.  
  
"I don't know."  
  
I look at him, then take out my D-Tector, slashing it across my hand. The energy's wash over me.  
  
Spirit Evolution Activate..Duskmon.  
  
Jerry stumbles back, falling. I draw my swords out, raising them to the rising sun.  
  
"My swords, Duskmon's swords, are covered in blood. Crimson red pain, that eases my pain, ever so briefly. The spirit of darkness, reflects the pain in my soul. It burns me, Burns me to become Duskmon. To hunt the night. To take life. To ease my own pain, by bring pain down upon others! I could kill you, boy. As easy as you would kill a fly."  
  
My eyes glow, as I look at his trembling form. My flesh, seems to burn.  
  
"Run."  
  
Jerry stumbles up, looking at me, his eyes, afraid, and sad at the same time. He stumbles away, and runs down the street.  
  
I watch him go, apart of me, yearning to speak to him again, another, stronger part, wanting to leap, and take him down with my swords. The pain inside, burns so hot. I know I'll have to hunt later. Or it will consume me. But night, is best for this hunter to prowl.  
  
"I kill..with such ease, but it truly gives me no pleasure. Just a few moments of emptiness,without pain."  
  
I De-Spirit evolve, and quickly walk down the street. 


	4. Chapter 4Shadows Consume, Darkness Overw...

Chapter 4-Shadows Consume, Darkness Overwhelms, Spirit Unleashed.  
  
I spend the rest of the day, wandering a large park nearby. I keep to the shadows, away from people. I walk, as if I cannot stop. That boy.. Jerry.. His past haunts me. He suffered such pain, at another's hands, yet he would not want to make his Father suffer, for it? I did not understand this. But then again, as the days pass, I understood less and less. The shadows around me, were growing. Covering all I used to know, all I used to be. Why do I not fear them? Because the shadows offered the promise of oblivion. The end to pain. I thought, if I could get them to consume me utterly, the pain I felt, so deeply would vanish. As well as.. other emotions I cared not to feel anymore. As night falls, I make my decision. It is Jerry's Father, I shall hunt tonight. He is a monster. He hurt a boy. He should suffer for it. I spirit evolve, to Duskmon, and leap into the night, heading back, to that building, leaping rooftop, to rooftop. When I get there, I wait, I see someone come out. I leap down, the man gives a startled gasp, as I put my blade, to his throat.  
  
Man:"w..What do you want? If i..i..f its money, take it..I don't have much"  
  
I stare at him, eyes unblinking.  
  
"Information, is what I require this night. Jerry. The boy. Where dose his father live?"  
  
Man:"w..why do you want to know that??"  
  
My eyes narrow, I hold the blade closer to his throat.  
  
"None of your concern. Tell me, and I'll let you live."  
  
The man stutters out a address. I withdraw my sword, and look at him, images flash though my head. I push them away, and Slide Evolve to Velgamon. The man screams, and passes out, my fierce beast form, apparently to much for him. I look down at his fallen form, the heat rising within me. Just one..right now.. Just one to ease the burning.. I push these thoughts aside, though its hard. The craving for.. shedding blood, has grown so much within me.I can barely control myself at times. I spreed my wings, and fly into the air, quickly before the craving overwhelms me.  
  
"Death..Is that all I am? No..I still feel. I wish I did not."  
  
I fly quickly though the city, and soon I reach a place, well the only word for it, is slums. I use my Velgamon eyes, to look at the addresses, and soon, I see the one I seek. I land on the front lawn, De-SpiritEvolving. I will be Duskmon.. But I wanted to look into Jerry's Father's eyes with my own human ones. I walk to the door, unafraid, fear is something, I do not feel anymore. I knock, and wait. Then knock again, louder. Loud footsteps, approach the door, and it opens. A Man, slightly drunken, stares at me.  
  
Man:"whyyyy whats a pretty little girl doing here at this time."  
  
I narrow my eyes.  
  
"I am looking for Jerry's Father. You are he?"  
  
Man:"That good for nothing, boy? Come in, if yaaaa want. Names Jack."  
  
He turns his back, leaving the door open for me. Fool. He thought I was harmless. If I was a normal girl, I'd be in danger now. I walk in, without hesitation, closing the door behind me.  
  
Jack leans against the wall, watching me, watching me far to closely. I growl, softly under my breath, his gaze, almost reminds me of Xiao Fung's gaze on me, during the demon war.  
  
Jack:"Now, what about my boy? Where is he, I'll go straiten him out, right quick."  
  
He grabs a bottle of bear off the table and takes a long swig, then offers it to me. I shake my head, not speaking yet.  
  
Jack:"Your not fun. Cat got your tongue?"  
  
I look at him, then ask my questions, bluntly.  
  
"Did you kill your wife? Did you almost kill your older son? Did you beat your younger son?"  
  
Jack stares at me, then rises in anger.  
  
Jack:"Who do you think you are, girl? What gives you the right to come in here, asking me these ridiculous questions?"  
  
I stare at him, looking into his eyes. I see the truth. He did do these things, he is guilty, he is a monster. He hurts others... like the demons did.  
  
"You did it. I know you did."  
  
Jack:"You can't prove anything girl. Now, Get out!"  
  
"What if I don't want to?"  
  
Jack seems to steam, and he picks up a empty bottle, shattering it against the table.  
  
Jack:"Then I'll make you, girl!"  
  
I shrug.  
  
"I'm not leaving. And nether are you. You make people suffer. I shall make you suffer."  
  
Jack advances on me, waving the bottle. I take out my D-Tector, sliding it across my hand, spirit evolving to Duskmon. Jack stares at me, then continues to advance.  
  
Jack:"Drunk to much, I guess, You won't fool me, girl!"  
  
I look at him, then with a lighting move, grab him by the neck, lifting him into the air.  
  
"I am not Girl. My name is Jen. My Spirit Evolved self, is Duskmon."  
  
Jack struggles in my grasp, and bashes the bottle across my head. It shatters, the glass falling to the floor..My hard armor, keeps me from getting cut.  
  
Jack:"Wh..What are you???"  
  
"Your worst nightmare."  
  
I raise one of my swords with my other hand, and drive it though Jack's shoulder, pinning him to the wall. He screams, as blood spills out, down the wall, and onto the carpet."  
  
"Admit it! Admit what you have done. Admit you have made others suffer."  
  
Jack:"Never! You won't get me to confess, to some cokinpiken lie!"  
  
I let go of his neck, and raise my other sword. I slash it first across his face, to the bone, then down his arm, just as deep. He screams, again, then begins to whimper.  
  
Jack:"OK..OK I did it.. jerry was aways whining..Matt stepped in my way..he should of known better!"  
  
I hiss, under my breath.  
  
"And?"  
  
Jack:"She..my wife..she tried to run out on me, her and Jerry, I had no choice!"  
  
I glare at him, and slash his chest deeply with my sword, he whimpers, more.  
  
Jack"I confessed, I'm sorry, let me go!"  
  
"Your SORRY? Dose that bring back the dead?? Dose that ease the pain of Jerry? DOSE IT?"  
  
My anger flairs, and I slash his leg with my sword, more blood, falling on the carpet, so much blood..crimson red. Why was I taking this long? Why did I not just end it?"  
  
Jack continues to whimper, and as I stare at him, faces pass by my eyes. Bai Tzai. Tso Lang. Xiao Fung. Po Kong. Shendu. The screams of the Digimon echo in my ears. The scared eyes, of the DigiDesteinds, flash. I don't realize what I am doing at first, but then, as the blood splatters on the wall, I realize, I am slicing Jack. Again, and again, never lethal blows. His screams grow, and I realize, I am enjoying it. I have never enjoyed killing.I did so, only to ease my own pain,but never got pleasure from it. Until this night. I drop my sword in shock, and stare at Jack. Hes covered in blood, many deep slashes puncture his flesh. I hiss and draw my other sword out, he weakly slumps to the ground, leaving a trail of blood on the wall. I pick up my other sword, and plunge it into his heart. His eyes flutter, and go blank, his head slumps to his chest. I look at my swords, the crimson blood covering them, and my hands. So much blood.. A loud knock on the door, I turn my head, I see flashing lights. Police. I must flee. But something, in me pauses. I try to move, but I cannot. My eyes flash, what am I doing? Why do I not flee, why am I frozen in place? The darkness, starts to cover my eyes, but its not right. The blackouts have never taken me, when I was Duskmon. Only when I was Jen. I try to move again, but everything seems to be moving in slow motion. The shadows cover my vision. I feel myself change, to Velgmon..and thats the last thing I feel, or see. 


	5. Chapter 5Aftermath, and Slow Acceptance

Chapter 5-Aftermath, and Slow Acceptance  
  
My eyes slowly flicker, my head pounds. I rise, flinching from the pain. I look around, unsure of where I am. It seems to be a hotel room. A TV sits in the corner. A cold morning breeze, blows though the open window. Glass shards litter the ground. I look at my hands, they are clean. And then, the following night rushes back to me. Jack. The way I ...I ..Duskmon tortured him. The police.. The darkness starting.. Slide-Evolving.. Then complete darkness.   
  
"What..Did I do?"  
  
My eyes flicker to the TV, I slowly get up, wincing from the headache, and turn it on. I flip, till I find the news, my hand freezes on the button, my eyes widen. The news helicopter is shooting scenes of the Slums, I had visited the prier night. Or.. What was left of them.  
  
TV/News Reporter:"We bring you news, live from the scenes. Last night a explosion of unknown type, rocked this area. The residents, had no warning."   
  
My eyes widen, as the Camera pans down.. Emergency workers are digging though the wreckage..black body-bags are being carried out.   
  
TV/News Reporter:"So far, there is numerous dead, and missing. No living victims, has been found as of yet."  
  
I go numb, the Reporters words, a droning in the back of my already pounding head. None alive? I..Could not of done this. True, Duskmon has taken life's, but never this many..Never as Velgmon.  
  
"No..This has to be something else."  
  
Shadows flash before my eyes, I stumble back, landing on my butt, on the floor. I cry out, softly, closing my eyes tight. More images flash before my eyes. The Officer, Shocked, opening fire at the transformed Velgmon. Flying though the night sky. Screaming in rage, in pain! Circling the Slums, The police officers firing up at me, Neighbors..children.. staring out of there doors and windows at the fuss. Shadows, more shadows, everywhere. A voice, mine..Velgmon's.. ~Zone Deleter!~ A huge Explosion, screams..even..children's screams!!  
  
"No..."  
  
I sit on the floor, shaking. This is impossible..Children.. I might..Duskmon might kill, but children..I never..take the innocents life..but I did..Velgmon.. No one could of survived that! NO ONE!  
  
TV/News Reporter:"By the City Records, at least 500 people, inhabited this suburb."  
  
500. The words vibrate in my head. 500. 500. Duskmon had not even killed that many people, in the six months I had been in this world. .. In one night..I destroyed 500 life's... Men..Women..Children. Some deserving of such fate..but others...  
  
I stand up, stumbling to the window. My hand grips the side of the broken window, the fragments of glass, slicing into my hand. I ignore it,the pain is nothing. Nothing to what i have done. I look out at the city, my eyes moving wildly. I pace, then go into the bathroom. I look into the mirror..Duskmon's face stares back at me.  
  
"You, did it! Duskmon! Not me, I DID NOT DO IT!"  
  
Duskmon's face, shimmers, and transforms to my own.   
  
~But you are Duskmon. You are the holder of the spirit of corrupted darkness. YOU are corrupt."  
  
"NO! No, its Duskmon, its the spirit, its NOT ME!"  
  
~You choice the Spirit of Darkness. It did not choice you. You choice it, because it reflected the pain, in your soul. The hatred. The anger.~  
  
I whimper, softly, crying.  
  
"No..I could not do such a thing..."  
  
~You killed your partners. You let them down. You let them die. YOU LET VEGETA DIE.~  
  
"Vegeta..I did not mean to! He was everything to me."  
  
~Yet you refused to accept Bai Tzai's offer..You could of had them returned. YOU could of saved them..~  
  
"But..it would of been evil to do so...would of hurt others."  
  
~Hurt others? What do you care about that anymore? LOOK at were caring for others got you.~  
  
"I..."  
  
~They never would of been taken had it not been for you. You were arragont. Idiotic. Foolish.~  
  
"I was..Its my fault. My fault their dead."  
  
~And its your fault, those people are dead.Everyone that Duskmon and Velgmon killed? You killed~  
  
"No..I am not Duskmon.."  
  
~No. Your not. Duskmon..IS you. Your dark desires, your pain, your hatred and anger, given physical form and power. You wish to hurt, you wish for death and suffering.~  
  
"NO!"  
  
I slam my fist against the mirror, it shatters, the glass slicing though my skin, blood dripping down into the sink. I scream, loudly. Like a banshee. Like a tormented spirit. I slowly whimper, once more, and fall to the ground.  
  
"I am Duskmon..Duskmon is me..I am Duskmon..Duskmon is me... I feel pain..burning rage..I inflict on others..I let the shadows consume me..I failed Vegeta..I deserve damnation.. why.. Why do I continue to feel!? Why won't these emotions go away, WHY!"   
  
I cry out, and then, here footsteps. I glare at the door, and grip my D-Tector. I feel a faint shiver, run though me, as I beast Spirit Evolve to Velgamon. With a huge, cry I fly out into the window, into the city, blindly. 


	6. Chapter 6The Faintest of Memory's

Chapter 6-The Faintest of Memory's  
  
I streak though the city, uncaring of any who see me. Uncaring of the eyes that stare up on the dark figure of Velgmon. Do they fear me? They should. I held their life's, in my wings. And the shadows, grew darker everyday. My heart, is dark...but why do I still feel pain? Sorrow? Guilt? Why dose the past, haunt me so? Why could I not forget it, loose myself to darkness.. to oblivion. Why do the images, of my past, haunt me so?  
  
~You shall be... a dark warrior...~  
  
I jerk my head a bit, closing my eyes, the images, flash again. Vegeta.. Pulsing winds..Taking him away.. Xiao chasing me.. fighting.. eyes, mine, so determined, full of hope. False hope. Foolish hope.  
  
So lost in my thoughts, unawares of what i am doing, my wings tilt up, and I slam into one of the tall unfinished skyscrapers, plunging though the glass window, with a shatter, I tumble inside, and lay there, fora few moments, on my back. I De-Spirit evolve, and sit up, leaning against the wall.  
  
"Why..such pain.."  
  
I whimper slightly to myself..wondering why I can't dampen my pain.. Why only blood seems to ease it, ever so slightly. But.. This... I destroyed 500 life's. As easily as one would turn of a light. I barely remember it.. I .. The shadows are consuming me ! I bolt right up, and run out of the room I have fallen in. I look around, seeing a staircase, I dash down it, running as if something is behind me, as if something is chasing me. But how can one run from themselves? Or the past? I trip, and fall the rest of the way, landing hard, slamming my head against the wall. The sudden rush of pain, brings me to my senses. I slowly get up, a faint trail of blood, running down my temple. I stumble out of the building, ignoring passing stares. I walk to the the dark alleyways, hours pass, and I do not stop, I loose all track of time, and direction. Night falls, and I find myself, outside of the building, I met Jerry. Why did my wanderings lead me here, again. I sigh softly, and lean against the wall, closing my eyes. Just resting, just for a few moments. A few moments, however, lasts longer. What am I waiting for? Why can't I seem to make myself leave here? Footsteps, approaching me. I open my eyes, knowing I will see him. Jerry. And I do. Standing before me, looking at me, staring at me. He knows it was I, who destroyed his old home.  
  
Jerry:"Jen. Why?"  
  
I look at him, then look to the ground.  
  
"I..don't know."  
  
Jerry:"How can you not know?? How can you do such a horrible thing, and not know?"  
  
"I..barely remember doing it. Just flashes."  
  
Jerry:"My father. You went there to kill him. Why?"  
  
I shrug slightly, wondering why I don't flee. I ran away from my friends, long ago, why do I not run now? Maybe, because this boy, is not by friend.  
  
"I felt he needed to be punished. I felt he should be."  
  
Jerry:"Is that how you think? Your not..God.. You don't decide things. You can't judge people. No mater what they've done."  
  
"Who will, then? Officers? Judges? Other humans?"  
  
Jerry:"You speak as if your ..not human. As if you don't consider yourself, one of us."  
  
"I am. I was born a human. I still am. But .."  
  
I shrug, not knowing what else to say. Was I human? Can a human, do what i have done, and still be human? Or are people who kill, not human.. Perhaps all I was now, is a monster."  
  
"Answer my question. Jerry. Who will judge?"  
  
Jerry:"I.. don't know. But, my Mom taught me, we are all judged for what we do, after we die."  
  
I shrug again.  
  
"I know how I will be judged. My actions, have damned me for all eternity."  
  
Jerry:"No, you can change, redemption is possible."  
  
"Not for me. Never for me. And its to hard. Everything is to hard. I just want it all to go away, sometimes. But I know, as long as I remember, it never will."  
  
Jerry just looks at me, his eyes, seem sad, he seems almost ready to cry. Why? Why is he sad for me? Why weep, for a monster, for one who has lost, everything she used to be. I turn my eyes away from his, and start to walk away.  
  
Jerry:"Jen..I'm sorry. I.. can't I help you?"  
  
I pause.  
  
"No one can help me. My friends tried, long ago. I am beyond anyones reach. I have fallen, to far, and I continue to fall, and I find, I want to fall. I hope for oblivion.For the end of emotions. For a end to the pain. I wish not to feel no more."  
  
Jerry:"I'll..I'll never hate you. Not even for what you did."  
  
He turns away and runs inside the building. I continue, along my way, puzzled. Why did he not hate me? I walk into the nearby park, and loose myself to the shadows. The shadows...cover me, my eyes, my soul. Blackness follows.  
  
I wake up, flinching, the sun shinning into my eyes. I have fallen asleep, one of the rare sleeps, that I do not dream, of memory's past. These dreamless sleeps, grow more and more rare. I slowly get up, and stretch, brushing leaves from my coat. I look down, seeing I am in a tree. I leap down, without looking, and here a startled gasp. I look behind me.. and utter a hiss, of surprise. Its her. Her shocked blue eyes, stare into mine, her long brown/blondish hair falling over her shoulders. She, who once was a good friend of mine. She who decided, after the demon war, to return to the real world. To build a life there.  
  
"D..Deedlit?"  
  
She looks at me, for a few moments longer, her eyes puzzled.  
  
Deedlit:"Jen? Its you, its really you."  
  
She makes to move toward me, I step backward, quickly.  
  
Deedlit:"Jen? Whats wrong, whats happened?"  
  
I look at her, for a few seconds more, then turn my back. I start to walk away, but her footsteps follow.  
  
Deedlit:"Jen, wait, please."  
  
She dose not know.. How could she? When she left, my descent had barely begun. I start to run, run away from her. As I ran away from all my friends back in the Digital World. I cannot bear it, the memory's.. I must run. 


	7. Chapter 7Time eases nothing

Chapter 7-Time eases nothing.  
  
I continue to run, blindly though the park. People cry out, as I almost hit them, but I ignore everyone, and everything. I must get away, the past, why dose it haunt me, why dose it torment me, why dose it chase after me. I run faster, and then, trip and fall onto the dew soaked grass. I lay there, for a few minutes, breathing hard, then slowly get up. I must keep going. The past pursues. I here a cry, behind me, its her. I start to get up, to run again, but to late, as she catches up to me.  
  
Deedlit:"Jen! Why are you running away from me, I don't bite!"  
  
I growl, softly under my breath. Will she chase me, for weeks on end, as Dave did? I almost.. I almost destroyed him, for it. I stopped myself. I don't want the past to repeat. I must not let her chase. My Digivice seems to heat up, burning me, as if my spirit, is telling me what to do, but no! I can't, I won't take her life. I turn, and face her. I'll show her. Show her fear. Show her not to chase. Show her, I am not Jen. Not the Jen she knew.  
  
"Do not pursue me, Deedlit. Leave me in peace, and never think of me, again."  
  
Deedlit stares at me, in shock.  
  
Deedlit:"Jen, I don't understand, whats happened to you? Why are you here, why are you..afraid of me?"  
  
"I am not afraid of you, Deedlit.I feel no fear, no more. But nether, do I feel warmth, or happiness."  
  
Deedlit:"Did something, happen?"  
  
I look at her, and shake my head.  
  
"Vegeta, was not enough?"  
  
Deedlit:"Jen..."  
  
She closes her eyes, I can tell reliving the pain the Demon War brought us. It was, after all, part of the reason she left the Digital World.  
  
Deedlit:"Jen, talk to me, please."  
  
"I talk to no one. I am alone. I am destined to be alone.. Vegeta.. torn from me..so cruelly. It was my fault, in part. I did not save him. I failed. And in turn, the DigitalWorld, failed me."  
  
I turn to go.  
  
Deedlit:"Jen, I won't let you just walk off! Not without knowing, whats happened to you."  
  
I stop. She won't stop chasing me. Like Dave, did not stop chasing me. I should show her.. I should tell her.. Then perhaps she will fear, and stay away from me. I grasp my D-Tector, to my chest.  
  
"You wish to know? You wish to see? See what I have become. What I am becoming."  
  
Deedlit:"Jen..what do you mean, becoming?"  
  
I take my hand, from my Digivice, with effort. I cannot show her.. I might..loose control.   
  
"Just trust me. You don't want to know. You don't want to know me."  
  
I begun running again, faster, and faster, she chases me, but its clear shes tired, she falls further and further behind. And then, I here her footsteps no longer. I pause, to rest, and thats when I here a cry behind me. I liston, there are more footsteps, I turn, shes in danger. I should just leave her.. but I can't. I run, and grasp my D-Tector. The familiar darkness covers me, and I become Duskmon, once again. I leap into the trees, leaping from tree to tree, I finally near the scene, Deedlit is fighting, 5 guys. Two others, lay unconscious on the ground. They have weapons, They, the predators of the park. I must stop them.  
  
"Deedlit.."  
  
I draw my swords out, and leap down, a silent shadow. The nearest looks up, in shock, right before my swords plunge into his stomach.He gasps, as blood gushes out of the wounds, I pull my swords out, and he falls. Deedlit looks at me, in shock, for one brief second, before turning to one of the others, attacking her.  
  
Deedlit:"Jen?"  
  
She kicks the nearest guy in the crotch he falls, she hits him again, shattering his nose. She ignores the knife, fallen on the ground. Her moves, are nonlethal, unlike mine. A gunshot, I feel the bullet hit me, but it dose not penetrate my armor. I sweep around, and swing my sword, it slices though the guys throat, more blood, on my blade, on the grass. The remanding three, one clutching his shattered nose, stare at me, then flee. Deeldit watches them go, but watching, is not enough for me. Duskmon's eyes, they begun to glow. I softly whisper, the sound of their doom. "  
  
"Deadly Gaze."  
  
Deedlit:"Jen! NO!"  
  
Its to late, and I would not of halted, even if there was time. The deadly lasers, hit the three, going clean though their hearts. They fall, insanely dead. I feel Deedlit's gaze, on my back.  
  
Deedlit:"Jen..What have you done?? There was no need to ..to.."  
  
I turn to her, and shes looking at the ground. At the blood. The Crimson blood.   
  
"I told you. You did not want to know me."  
  
She continues looking at the crimson splattered ground, slowly starting to cry.  
  
Deedlit:"Jen, how could you? The Jen I knew, never would be this brutal, this cold."  
  
"The Jen, you knew, exists no longer. I am..A lost one, now."  
  
Deedlit:"No, I won't believe it! You don't have to be lost!"  
  
I look at her, her tear filled eyes, bring back far to many memory's. memory's that burn my soul. I wish not to remember. Why did she have to find me. Now I had to show her, I was beyond saving. Beyond all redemption. She must watch the news. She must of heard about the Slums. About the death.  
  
"I am to far gone. Forever lost."  
  
My body, shifts, and changes, into that of Velgmon.  
  
"I destroyed that neighborhood. Destroyed it. Everyone dead."  
  
She stares at me, shaking, as I lift into the air, I turn away, and fly high into the sky, leaving the last of my past behind me..or so I thought.  
  
Three Months Later.  
  
"Help!" A girl screams. She runs, and trips, then screams again. Two men approach her, grabbing her roughly.  
  
First:"Well well, not so brave now that your boyfriend ran away. Now we can have you, all to our-selfs."  
  
The second chuckles.  
  
The girl screams again, but this part of night, no one hears. No one but me. I wait, above, on the rooftop. I fidget, unable to keep still any longer. Damn it.Why do I still care? Why do I still feel guilty, if I don't help people? I hate it. I wish I was cold! Completely. I leap down, the two guys look at me.  
  
Second:"Its ..that thing!"  
  
He recognizes me. My form, is known now. The silent hunter, who lurks in the shadows. Who leaps out, with blades of darkness, to pierce the hearts of the guilty. A slayer of men, the hunter. But I am also, the hunted. Police. FBI. They all want me brought down. The first man, lets go of the girl, and flees into the night. The second, comes at me, with a knife. I grab his arm, and twist it, the snap of bone, echoing throughout my ears. The scream, that follows, even more the sweeter. I bring my sword up, and impel it in his stomach, he screams again, as the blood flows onto my sword, my hand. I twist the blade, wishing more screams, he rewards me, with a even greater cry. I push him down, and plunge my other sword, into his chest. I turn, and see the girl, cowering before me.  
  
Girl:"D..don't kill me."  
  
I should pursue the other one..But I pause. I raise my sword and with a leap, I am in front of her, my sword at her throat. She whimpers, and crys. I try to slice her throat open,but can't. Part of me wants to, part of me dose not.  
  
"Why can't I..just kill? Why is it so easy to take those who are guilty life, yet not the innocent? I do it, when I am Velgmon, easy enough..Why do I still have these feelings??"  
  
The girl closes her eyes, whimpering louder. I move away from her, striking the building in anger. I leap, onto the building, and away. I move, building to building,until I stop, and rest.  
  
"Why.."  
  
these past few months. I thought my emotions would vanish. But they have not. The pain, just grows, within me. Deeper and deeper, no mater how many life's, I take. I look around, surprised. The blackness, has not claimed me, as it has, almost every other time, I have hunted. I look to the side, and see a rundown hotel. The flickering of a TV, inside one room, catches my eye. I leap down, and leap though the window, with a crash. A person, looks at me, and shakes, slowly backing toward the door.  
  
"Go. Tell no one I am here. Or I will hunt you. Kill you."  
  
The man stampers he will not..and flees, slamming the door behind him. My eyes, turn toward the TV.  
  
News Reptorter:"Another killing, of this mysterious dark figure.."  
  
I tune it out. About me, they speak of. Duskmon. Somethings, they even speak of Velgmon. On the blackest of nights, in the deepest of blackouts, I transform to Velgmon. What happens after, I only remember in snippets. Flash's of utter destruction. Death.  
  
I De-Spirit evolve, and rest on the bed, eyes closed. My thoughts, turn to the past. Against my will. Why. Can't I forget. Vegeta..My long lost, dead partner. The Demon War. The bitter hatred, lust for revenge, and decent into madness, that started there. The demons.. I am snapped out of my thoughts, as I here something strange, on the news.  
  
News Reporter:"We interrupt, with breaking news! Something is destroying a large part of.."  
  
a huge explosion drones her out, and I look at the TV, Something strange flashes across it. A strange creature.. A Digimon? I bolt up, and look at the TV, another, I see something else, but the camera goes black, but I see, where they are. I must go! I grab my D-Tector, Beast Spirit Evolving to Velgmon. I must hurry. I fly out the window, streaking across the sky, heading westward, and down. I fly for hours, the stars twinkling above me. I finally get to my destination, I hover over it, and I see ruin. Every things destroyed, almost leveled completely. Body's litter the ruble. What has happened here? I fly around the city, and then I see, in the distance, I see someone standing, amiss the ruble. Two body's, lay around him. I land, transform to Duskmon. I leap, from rubble pile to rubble pile, staying out of view. Finally, I am within 15 feet. I look out, at this person..if it is a person. He stands, taller then a man. He is staring at the two body's below him, I can't see details, they are hidden by ruble,from my view. The being, is smiling. He appears well armored. I feel that he is strong. What is he? Who is he? What is he doing here. Before I know what I am doing, I leap, landing 10 feet from him. He looks up, his cold blue eyes, staring into mine. I look, and know, he is the one, responsible for this destruction. I continue to stare at him, silently. Who is he? 


	8. Chapter 8A Familiar Laugh

Chapter 8-A Familiar Laugh  
  
Long moments pass, that I stare into this beings eyes. They seem completely cold. I finally speak.  
  
"Are you, a Digimon?"  
  
He looks at me, then laughs. His laugh sends shivers down my spine. Its...almost familiar. But how? He moves and points to one of the figures on the ground.  
  
Being:"This was the Digimon. A DigiDestetined Spirit evolved. Much like yourself."  
  
His eyes narrow, he knows I am human, not Digimon, inside. But no fear, passes though my heart. If he wants to kill me, for being human, he can. What dose it mater? I move closer to him, to the bodys, I want, need to see there faces. I look down. As I knew I would, I recognize both. The first, the one he points to..one of the SupremeDD's. Veg15. The other, another SupremeDD. Mark. I stand there, shocked, trying not to let it be seen. This.. creature, he destroyed two SupremeDD's? Even the demons failed in that.  
  
"Who are you?"  
  
The figure smirks.  
  
Being:"I should ask the same of you."  
  
"I am Duskmon. Spirit of Corrupted Darkness. I am the hunter, who lurks in the shadows, who's blades, are stained crimson, with blood."  
  
The figure looks at me, a small bit of shock, in his eyes.  
  
Being:"Dark DigiDesteind..? Could this be?"  
  
"I do not consider myself, a DigiDestined no more."  
  
Being:"Then what do you consider yourself? Duskmon, and nothing more?"  
  
"I am a monster. I have slain. I have killed, the guilty, and the innocent alike."  
  
Being:"You say guilty, before innocent. Can it be, you are not the monster, you think you are?"  
  
"How would you know, what I am?"  
  
The being looks around, then walks over to some rubble, pulling a laptop out of the rubble. Amazingly, it turns on. Data starts to flash across the screen, faster then the my eyes can keep up. He frowns, and throws the laptop once again in the rubble, then turns toward me again. A gun-shaped weapon, pops out of his arm, he aims it at me. It looks, strangely familiar. I stand, not moving. Death.. Has it come for me?  
  
Being:"You are not a monster. You are just a human, seeking to be one. But your weak human emotions, drive you only to kill the guilty. You only kill the innocent, when you loose all sense of self. You are mearly a wannabe. And I shall end your life here and now."  
  
I stare at him.  
  
"End it then. My pain never ends. It won't cease in death. You say I only destroy the guilty? That alone, damns me. I .."  
  
I stop for a few moments, do I dare say what I wish to say next. There is something odd about this creature, something almost familiar, but how? I have never seen him before.  
  
The being raises his weapon, to my head.  
  
Being:"Speak your last words!"  
  
"How? How do you kill so many, hurt so many, and feel NOTHING?"  
  
Being:"You want a answer, is that a last request?"  
  
He smirks at me, again.  
  
Being:"Easy. I am not human, so I don't feel your weak emotions. But I do feel. The pain of others, its enjoyable."  
  
I lower my head.  
  
"Kill me then. I am human.. I feel. I wish I did not. I am tormented by my past, by what I have done. Damn it! Why do I feel guilt, sorrow..pain? Why do I still CARE? How many life's must I TAKE?"  
  
The figure looks at me, and laughs again.  
  
Being:"You wish end to them? Foolish human. One can rid themselves, of all humanity. But your killing the wrong kind of people. You must destroy, the innocents."  
  
I look at him.   
  
"I can't. I've tried."  
  
The being looks at me, then slowly, ever so slowly, he lowers his weapon.  
  
Being:"Try harder. Or.. Perhaps you need help. Help I could...perhaps give you."  
  
I look at him, and speak. I should say no, part of me screams for me to. But if I do, the pain will continue. My torment, will never end.  
  
"How? Tell me what I must do."  
  
The being, starts to speak, but then, from the rubble, one of the fallen SupremeDD's, who I thought to be dead, rises his head. Mark.  
  
Mark:"D...damn you..to ..he...ll..Sigma"  
  
His head falls back, his eyes faintly moving. I stare at him in shock, did he say..Sigma? My mind flashes back, back to the demon war. Bai Tzai, screaming how her creation would come one day. Sigma. Was this him? Was this being standing before me, one of my greatest enemy's, creation?   
  
Sigma's eyes narrow, as he stares at me.  
  
Sigma:"Something about you,seems almost familiar."  
  
I look at him.  
  
"You.. Are you Bai Tzai's creation?"  
  
He looks at me, slowly he raises his weapon again.  
  
Sigma:"You, know about her. Mine Creator. Who is apart of me. Zair, and Sigma, are one and the same."  
  
I stare at him, I can't hide the shock in my eyes.  
  
Sigma:"You know. I must know you."  
  
What was I going to do? Run? I could run, he would slay me. Death, dose it mater anymore? But.. Something in me, wanted what he offered. He said he knew, how to end this pain. I would do anything, to not feel. Anything. I slowly sigh, and move closer to him, till I am only a few feet from him. I look into his eyes.  
  
"Kill me if you wish. Kill me for who I am. I no longer care. A end to the pain, is all I ask. But I fear, I can never have it, not even in death. For my sins, I will suffer forever. Life I suffer in. Death I would suffer in. You do me, no favors, by ending my life."  
  
I continue to look at him, as I slowly DeDigivolve. As I slowly, become myself. His eyes widen, in visible shock, and for a few long moments, he mearly studies me. He knows me. I know him. Zair.. We go back a long ways. Demon War. I can't believe, I am standing this close, to a being, who's part my greatest enemy.  
  
Sigma:"Shadow."  
  
He completely lowers his weapon, withdrawing it back into his arm.  
  
"I am. That name. It fi fits me better now."  
  
I stumble over my words, and look down, away from his eyes.  
  
For a few long moments, he dose not speak. Mark's head, rises again, and he stares at me, weakly whispering.  
  
Mark:"..Je..n? y..your..alive?"  
  
Sigma:"She is. Reports of your death, Shadow, are greatly exaggerated."  
  
I jerk my head up. My friends, think I am dead? It makes sense though. Why no one pursued me. Why I was not followed.  
  
Sigma laughs again, and reaches to the ground, picking up a sharp piece of metal, he tosses it right at me. I swing my hand up, catching it, I stare at Sigma.   
  
Sigma:"Shadow. Mine Creator,wishes for revenge, against you. But this, is oh so much better. Look at how you have fallen. Ceased to be a good little DigiDesteind. But you are denied everything. You are a simpering fool, Who seeks what she cannot attain. For human values, you hold onto, unconsciously perhaps. You will never attain the release from your emotions, unless you attain release from your humanity! And only I can help you with that. Once your greatest enemy, now perhaps, your only chance for what your dark heart desires. You truly are like Zair, more then I ever thought."  
  
I shrug slightly, not answering. What did he want? Could he give, what he promised? Should I even, accept it? He was Zair..I felt this. The same darkness, she carried. The same, pure evil.  
  
Sigma:"Take my hand, Shadow. I will teach you, to become what you desire. But first, you must take the first step. Destroy Mark."  
  
I don't move, I can't.. I can't just slay one of my old friends.  
  
"I..I.."  
  
Sigma:"Do not say you can't. You can. But if you don't want to. If you want to be in pain. Don't. Leave here. I'll let you go. Mine revenge, will be sated eater way. You become like me, or you live with your guilt, and pain the rest of your miserable life, and beyond it."  
  
I twitch, ever so slightly. I can't bear this pain, forever! I want it to end, I want to let go.. of all I was, I want to be free, of these emotions. I touch my D-Tector. Can I do it?  
  
Sigma:"Do not. You must take this step, Shadow, as you are. Not Duskmon. Do it! Take the first step, to ending your pain!"  
  
I shut my eyes, tightly, shaking ever so slightly, then my thoughts, turn to the past. All I did, for the Digital World, how I was repayed with pain. I step toward Mark, and kneel by him. He utters words, weakly, I shut them out. I raise the piece of metal, I open my eyes, looking at it. Am I really this way? Can I do this.. But the pain. My D-Tector begins to burn again, my soul seems to burn with it. Vegeta.. my other partners, my own pain.. my sins, the blood on my hands.. Whats one more, if it eases my pain, if it will help, completely end my pain.   
  
Sigma:"Think of him. He's never suffered as you have. And what good has he done? He fell to darkness. He killed Veg15! He's guilty, Shadow. As guilty, if not more so, of the ones you've killed on this world."  
  
I growl softly, moments pass, but soon, the thought of eternal pain, is to much for my heart to bear. I bring the piece of metal down, with a quick slash across Mark's throat..it is done. His blood pours down. Upon my hands. My human hands. The first life, I have ever taken..as Jen. I shake, ever so slightly, then tilt my head to the sky, and howl. A sound of pain, yet release as well.  
  
Sigma laughs, as I rise. I continue to stare at the blood on my hands, and then, to much. I grab my D-Tector, Spirit Evolving to Duskmon. But the blood, is on my blade. Crimson. Now, there is blood everywhere. Crimson Red.. Staining my Blades, my wings, my hands. I close my eyes, the darkness taking me again. The last sound I here, Is Sigmas insane laughter. 


	9. Chapter 9Familiar Grounds

Chapter 9-Familiar Grounds  
  
I flicker my eyes open, and shift them, looking around without moving my head. I seem to be in a darkened building of sorts. Pale light filters in from a small window. I stay were i am, for a few moments, kneeling on a large block of stone. I wonder what happened this time, this black out, but i push that aside. I don't think about what happens when I blackout. I don't want to. I move to the window, and look out, to see a familiar site. I know where I am, instantly. Back. The Digital World. Sigma. He must of brought me here. I look at my hands, they are clean now, at least to the eyes. But I feel the warm blood on them still. I feel myself slash his throat still. I killed one, who used to be my friend. And .. I felt.. The pain, I aways feel, seemed a little dimmer. Not much, but a little. I hear, his footsteps behind me.  
  
Sigma:"A part of you is gone, Shadow. Do you not feel it?"  
  
I slowly not, not turning toward him. I still can't believe, that I have agreed to this. In the past, such would never of even crossed my mind.  
  
Sigma:"Destroy more, of those who were your friends, and little by little, you'll find that which torments you, fade. You will truly be a monster. But I hope, you don't stop there."  
  
I turn to him. I already considered myself a monster, for what i had done.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
Sigma:"Become a monster,a true monster, and your human emotions, will be buried. But they will be there. Become more, and they will vanish, like a bad dream."  
  
I look at him, thoughts cross my mind, of words spoken by the demon, Bai Tzai, long ago. Words of monsters, of demons. Then he speaks again, as if reading my mind, as if he knows were my thoughts have gone.   
  
Sigma:"Do you not, remember, Shadow? Become a monster, and your emotions will be buried. Become a demon, and your emotions, will be gone."  
  
"All of them?"  
  
Sigma:"Not all. Just the ones that pain you so. Guilt. Sorrow. Compassion. Love."  
  
He says these words, with such venom. Such hatred. I think, of all the pain, these have caused me. Love for my lost partners.. Knowing I never will see them again. Sorrow that they are gone. Compassion for the innocent, which keep me from loosing my pain. Guilt, over the ones I have slain. I find, I hate these emotions to. Buried, if they were mearly buried, they would haunt me, in my dreams. I utter the words, the instant I do,I know there's no going back.  
  
"I want them gone."  
  
Sigma slowly smiles, then laughs.   
  
Sigma:"First you must become a monster. Kill those, who you care for. And then..."  
  
He grins, more.  
  
Sigma:"Help me, destroy this world. Once you destroy a world, you will become a demon. I'll see to that."  
  
I go pale, slightly. Destroy my friends..and this hole world? This world, which I called home, at one time? Friends, I called family?   
  
Sigma seems to sense my uncertainty.  
  
Sigma:"Shadow. What do you have here, anymore? What dose this world offer you? Your so called friends, have forgotten you. They think you died, poor little girl gone insane. There is nothing here for you. Let this world burn, for the pain it has caused you."  
  
I don't answer, I want the pain to end..but..  
  
Sigma:"Shadow. Do not think of it now. One step at a time. Duskmon. Your spirit has absorbed the waters, I gave it. It will help you. But to fully help yourself, you must destroy."  
  
He takes one last look at me, then walks out, leaving me in the shadows. I continue to look out the window, softly singing a song under my breath.  
  
"I can show you the world...shinning shimmering splendid.. tell me princess..when did you last let your heart decide.."  
  
I start laughing.  
  
"Why do people make such stupid movies? They fool kids into thinking, everything a dream, everything will work out. The world dose not shine, hope is but a illusion, that shimmers, and fades. Why would one, truly wish to be shown the world?"  
  
I pause. Here I am, singing, and talking to myself. Deep in, what I would of at once time, consitred enemy territory. Thinking about doing the unthinkable. About destroying, all I once loved, and cared for, for the promise, of release from human emotions.. the ones that hurt me. I sigh softly. If I ever had a chance to decide I... I shake my head. I must not think of how things could of been. The present, was how it was, and that is all. I move away from the window, and sit in the corner. My eyes flicker, and I yawn, ever so slightly, quietly falling asleep.  
  
Flashes of black, the shadows leap on me. There touch, is white hot pain onto my flesh. Vegeta appears, before me, his red scales glimmering. He's crying.. tears of..of blood..   
  
Vegeta:"Why...."  
  
I stare at him and shake my head, then clench my eyes shut.  
  
"Your dead! I can't bring you back, leave me alone! Your just a memory of what happened..of the past."  
  
The shadows hiss at me, and Vegeta turns from me, and vanishes.  
  
Shadows:"You would hur....t us?"  
  
I shake my head again.  
  
"You don't understand, its the ONLY way!"  
  
Shadows:"why..."  
  
They to, vanish.   
  
I bolt right up, and shake slightly, then stand up and start to pace. Damn nightmares.. they never leave me. Don't they understand the only way to ease my pain, is doing what Sigma says to do?? Suddenly, I here voices, I stop, and pause. Another voice, Sigma, echos in my head.  
  
Sigma:~They are intruders. Destroy them. Free a bit more of yourself, rid yourself of a bit more of your pain.~  
  
His voice vanishes. I look at my D-Tector, and clench it, The Spirit of Darkness, covers me. Duskmon. My head tilts the the sound of voices, and I slightly move, a deadly shadow. Soon, the voices owners appear in my site. I hug the shadows, waiting. Two of them. Two I have never seen before.   
  
First:"Dragoon..Should we be here, alone?"  
  
Dragoon:"Shhhh. I told you, I found this place last night. Everyone just believes its empty,but it looks suspicious, Duo."  
  
Duo:"I don't like it here. We should leave."  
  
Dragoon:"Whats to be afraid of?"  
  
Duo:"SIGMA!"  
  
Dragoon:"Like he'd live in a place like this."  
  
Duo:"Uh..if you don't think hes here, why are we?"  
  
Dragoon:"Something odd about this place. Don't worry. I'm sure there is nothing to fear."  
  
I choice that moment, to step out of the shadows.  
  
"Nothing to fear? How about, Fear itself?"  
  
Both DigiDestineds utter a startled gasp, as they stare at me.  
  
Duo:"AHHHHHHHHHHHH"  
  
Dragoon:"Will you shut up? Thats a Spirit. Its a DigiDestined."  
  
Duo:"uh..I never seen that spirit before. How can you tell?"  
  
Dragoon holds up his Digivice.  
  
Dragoon:"Duh, it says, Spirit of Corrupted Darkness. Meaning Digidesteind."  
  
Duo:"Oh! Thats a relive."  
  
I stare at them. So young. So native. They still believe, things are a dream. A happy little dream. I was about to end their dream, to turn it into a nightmare.  
  
"Is it?"  
  
Duo lets out a nervous laugh.  
  
Duo:"Well your not a evil machine, and your a DigiDesteined, so yes"  
  
Dragoon:"Who are you?"  
  
I stare at them.  
  
"I am Duskmon. Spirit of Corrupted Darkness."  
  
Dragoon:"Well, duh, I mean who are you? What DD?"  
  
Duo:"They are weird..."  
  
I look first at Dragoon, then at Duo. These, were the two I was ..to kill? They were so young..  
  
"I am the lost one. The one who has long since, fallen to shadows. The one who seeks, oblivion, from humanity."  
  
Duo slowly backs away.  
  
Duo:"Dude, your just creepy..uh Dragoon..??"  
  
Dragoon:"We should, um be going..sorry to disturb you."  
  
I look at them, with one quick movement, my swords are out, at my side.  
  
"You will not leave here."  
  
Duo:"Ahhhh ..ok you want uus to s..stay fine fine, wanta play a game?"  
  
Dragoon:"HEY! You can't boss us around!"  
  
I look at them, silently. I will speak no more to them. This is hard enough, as is. I raise my swords, and focus my eyes on Duo, first. He shall be the first to... I slowly lower my swords. What am I doing.. This cannot be right.. I growl softly.  
  
"Must..end the pain.."  
  
Duo:"uuhhhhhhhh Dragoon...maybe we should like, RUN!"  
  
Dragoon:"Why? its a bully. We should kick his ass."  
  
Duo:"Or her... hard to tell."  
  
Dragoon:"Uh..that things not a her!"  
  
Duo:"RUN! I left my partner outside, and you did not even bring yours!."  
  
I look at Duo, about to run, I try to think of the times I destroyed the guilty.Tried to picture this DigiDesteind as guilty.. it was hard. How could I do this? I howl, loudly, causing both to jump.   
  
~There is no going back, Shadow.~  
  
A voice echos in my mind. I see Mark again, I see myself slashing his throat.. I see all the humans I destroyed.. And then I see the wings of Velgmon. People screaming in fear.. right before Velgmon's dark fire engulfs them. I raise my swords, and leap at Duo. He just stands there, shaking, then he bolts away. Dragoon looks at me, for a instant, then tackles me. I push him aside, My eyes are focused on Duo first, not him. I land by Duo, he trys to run, I swing my sword, impelling him though his back, into his heart. He lets out a stutter, as his blood, his life, sprays onto my sword. I withdraw it, he falls. I stare for a few long minutes. Crimson blood. I feel another small part of me, fade away. Another small part of the pain, vanish. I feel a weight on my shoulders, hear cursing in my ears. Dragoon, the other, has jumped on me. He beats me with his hands. The blows don't hurt. I wish they did.  
  
Dragoon:"WHY? He did nothing, you bas----! WHY???"  
  
I withdraw one sword, reach up, and grab his wrist. I throw him to the ground, and stand over him, sword raised. Dragoon just looks at me, fury in his eyes..I remember such hatred. I felt it so vividly, against the demons.  
  
Dragoon:"Why..if your going to kill me, TELL ME WHY?"  
  
I look at him.  
  
"To end my pain. You cannot understand."  
  
I swing my sword at him, he dodges, it strikes across his shoulder. He looks at Duo, then runs out, into the night. I look at him, then my Duskmon eyes glow, Deadly Gaze, I strike at him. He somehow dodges, the beams penetrating into his side and back, instead of his heart. He falls, I leap my bloodstained sword held above me. I strike down at him, but a dark green blur, almost black in the night, strikes me. Stingmon.  
  
Stingmon:"My Partner! You killed him! Spiking Strike!"  
  
I look at Stingmon, and strike at him. My swords go right though him, he bursts into data. Fading away like a memory. Like Vegeta must of. I stand there, unawares Dragoon has run. For a few long minutes, precious minutes. I finally snap out of it, Dragoon is gone. I must find him. No prey must escape Duskmon. I see his figure, in the far distance. Fear gives him speed, and strength. I know I have injured him badly. Blood stains the ground. I run after him. The stars flashing above me. Accusing me. I run after him, but then, I see lights in the distant. Its to late. I leap into the trees, following them to the lights, then stop. Dragoon has fallen into another's arms. EternaL's arms. EternaL looks at Dragoon, in shock, the young DigiDestinded is near death. His blood, stains EternaL's hands, and cloths.   
  
EternaL:"Oh my F------ god! HELP!!!!!! Someone get out here, and HELP!"  
  
Another comes running, my eyes widen in shock, and I sink deeper behind the trees leaves, silent. Kazin. One of.. my best friends.. or rather, he was. Long ago, it feels like another life, somehow. I watch, silent. They don't know I am there.  
  
Kazin knees by Dragoon's side, feeling his pulse. Slowly, he shakes his head.  
  
Kazin:"To late..hes to far gone."  
  
EternaL:"No! Not another one, First we loose Mark and Veg15, now Dragoon? Kazin!"  
  
Kazin starts to speak, but Dragoon weakly opens his eyes. I should attack. I should destroy the three, right now. But I can't make myself leap down. I can't move.  
  
Dragoon:"d..Duo...he..hes dead...I..it killed h..him.."  
  
EternaL:"What did? WHAT DID THIS? Sigma?"  
  
Kazin's eyes narrow.  
  
Kazin:"If Sigma's killed ANOTHER being,I swear."  
  
Dragoon:"..n...ot...s..igma.. d..duskmon.."  
  
Dragoon's eyes, roll back and he goes limp, in EternaL's arms. EternaL looks shocked, and looks at Kazin.  
  
EternaL:"It can't be... her, can it?"  
  
Kazin:"No. It..She'd never do this. Nothing this horrible."  
  
EternaL:"She.. She almost killed Dave, Kazin."  
  
Kazin stands up, and closes his eyes.  
  
Kazin:"She stopped it. She died stopping it. This new Duskmon, it can't be Jen."  
  
I narrow my eyes, then close them. I had a urge, to leap down. Screaming it was me. I could do something this horrible. But I did not. I stayed quiet, hidden.  
  
EternaL slowly rises caring the still form of Dragoon in his arms.  
  
EternaL:"I hope your right, Kazin."  
  
Kazin turns, not answering. Dose he suspect, in his darkest thoughts, it could be me? Or is denial, that strong? He moves into the Base, EternaL behind him. I wait, for almost a hour, then leap away, into the night. I must get back, before the dawn, before the burning rays of sun rise. My blades, are stained again. Aways crimson blood. 


	10. Chapter 10Death rides, on Wings of Darkn...

Chapter 10-Death rides, on Wings of Darkness  
  
I arrive, back, shortly before dawn. I collapse, in the corner, shaking ever so slightly. The shock of what I have done reverberates though my soul, yet I cannot deny, a small part of my pain, has eased, and vanished. Why dose the crimson blood, sooth me? Why dose it calm, the fire that burns me so? I continue to shake, closing my eyes. I don't sleep, I just sit there, for hours on end. The sun rises, but the beams of light and warmth, do not penetrate my corner, nor my heart. I ignore everything, only the sound of my beating heart I can here. Darkness, shadows, overwhelming. The morning passes, as dose the afternoon, and evening, and Finlay I rise, as dusk starts to fall. I here footsteps, I knew he'd come.   
  
Sigma:"You hesitated. But all the better. They know, A DigiDestined stalks them."  
  
I don't look at him. I don't want to. I walk to the window, and see we are somewhere else. I grasp my D-Tector.   
  
"I killed them."  
  
Sigma:"Your pain, it eased. I felt it, Shadow! I felt you.."  
  
"Shut up."  
  
He stops, and looks at me, he should strike me down, for that, I think. But he dose not, he just watches me. Finally I can't take it any longer. I must let the cool darkness embrace me. I Spirit Evolve, to Duskmon, and turn my back on him.  
  
Sigma:"Tell me, Shadow. Did you enjoy it?"  
  
My eyes narrow, I still don't answer.  
  
Sigma:"Afraid to let yourself enjoy it? There pain, you caused it. YOu have power to cause such."  
  
My eyes flicker, I remember that night. Jack..the way I tortured him, before I killed him. The way I enjoyed it. Sick.. How could I? But..it was better then feeling pain, even if it was for just a short while. I don't understand, how I could enjoy my friends...my ex-friends pain. How I .."  
  
"S...."  
  
The shadows, start to cover my eyes, the blackness, I know is soon to follow. Sigma laughs, and I feel myself transforming to Velgmon. No, not now..but, it was to late.   
  
A hellish scream, a flash of intense light. Darkness, then a flash of lighting. I feel the cold night wind on my wings, I look down, I know what I will see. Destruction. The ground is scared, ruined. Marked by Velgmon. And in the middle, of such destruction, lies a body. Another DigiDesteind. Velgmon has had its prey, this night. I swoop down, unable to stop myself. I must see, who I have slain. Lighting flashes again, and the face, is illuminated. EternaL lies on the ground, his eyes are closed, and no breath rises from his chest. I land, transforming to Duskmon. I stand at the edge, of ruin, and stare. My thoughts are dark..another part of my pain seems to vanish, but in a way, whats left seems to grow in intensity. My body throbs, burns. So deep is my thoughts, I fail to here footsteps behind me. Until a voice speaks.  
  
"EternaL..." The voice says, the pain, evident. I turn and see Kazin. Kazin..Why him? Why must it be him? The only one worse, to face right now, would be Dave, himself. Kazin's eyes move to mine, he stares. He must know its me. Or dose his heart deny, what his brain trys to tell him?  
  
Kazin:"Who are you?"  
  
I don't answer. Why dose he ask the question? Who else could I be? I don't answer. I can't speak. I look at him, he grips a D-Tector. By his side, approaches a Armadillomon. He should attack. I should attack. But nether of us, move. Thunder booms in the sky, and I just stare at him. Its time. They deserve to know, who hunts them in the night. Who stalks them from the shadows. Who will destroy them, to ease their own pain. They deserve to know. Lighting flashes across the sky, when it fades, I am Duskmon no longer. Kazin's eyes fall, and he drops his SupremeDigivice, his hands are shaking. He looks at me, pain and anger, reflected in his eyes..and unbelief.  
  
Kazin:"No. This is impossible. Jen-Chan, would never do anything like this."  
  
I don't answer. I can't seem to find words. I hold up my D-Tector, ever so briefly. A strand of hair, falls over my eyes, as Kazin continues to stare at me. He trys to speak, but no words come. What words can be said? I look at him, once more, and turn my back on him. He should pick up his Digivice. He should strike me down, but he moves not a inch. I here him sigh, filled with anguish.  
  
Kazin:"Jen-Chan..."  
  
He has accepted the truth. I knew it would not take him long. I start to walk away, he dose not follow.  
  
"I am lost. Forevermore, the lost one. My heart, has fallen to darkness. I am not, the Jen you knew. Nor shall I be, ever again."  
  
I can think, of no other words to say. What can I say? How can I explain, what I have become, what I am still becoming. How can I say, that I wish it this way, for the pain within me, is to great to bear. I grip my D-Tector, Transform to Velgmon, and leap into the air. I fly off, not looking behind me.   
  
I fly as far away from Kazin,from the carnage i created as I can. I fly for hours, then stop, and land on a large rock. I look at the horizon, just a few short hours before the dawn. I change back to Jen, sitting on the cold rock. I clench my eyes shut, but no images come.  
  
"Why can't I REMEMBER??"  
  
Only flashes, brief glimpses come to me, after blackouts. After Velgmon. But this time, even brief glimpses, fail to revel themselves before my eyes. I never wanted to remember what happens..before. Velgmon.. Darkness... What I do when I am Velgmon.. I do not wish to think about. But now, here, I want to know! I want to fully see, what monasteries I commit when I loose myself completely to darkness. EternaL.. He was my friend. I destroyed him. Velgmon did, and I could not even remember the slightest bits of this. I sit there, shivering in the cool predawn air. I feel more lost, then ever. I await the darkness at the end of the tunnel. The release of emotions, of pain. If I become a demon, will my pain vanish? Will my memory's cease to haunt me? Is what Sigma, who I should hate, says, true? He is a demon. He seems to feel no pain. He seems to feel no humanity. It seems so much easer.. I just can't bear this pain much longer. But the end of the tunnel, to reach I must first become a monster, then a demon. I am a monster.. I am becoming a monster. I have slain DigiDesteineds. I have slain friends. With my own two hands, with the blades of Duskmon, with the wings of Velgmon. All my forms, were covered in crimson blood. Sweet, and sour. Sweet, for it eases the pain within me. Sour, for it causes the remanding pain, to deepen. My guilt grows. But the darkness, within me, keeps me hunting. Keeps me spilling the blood. The darkness at the end of the tunnel. Its my only salvation. The only way to end my pain. The only way to be free of it. Humanity. Am I so ready to loose this? But yes..how can i not, when its caused me such pain? Yet, if I am ready, why did I not kill Kazin!? Why?? These thoughts plague me, as the sun slowly rises. I close my eyes, not moving, just sitting. My soul is troubled. But I still am cloaked in shadows. I still seek the darkness. A end to my pain.I will seek the end of the tunnel. Its the only way. 


	11. Chapter 11Pain deepens, Shadows Grow

Chapter 11-Pain deepens, Shadows Grow  
  
My eyes are closed, I am oblivious to the sounds, and sites, of the Digital World. Again, I do not sleep, mearly fall, deep into the shadowed thoughts of my mind. Leaving myself completely vulnerable. But my safety, I have long since not cared about. Hours pass, the sun warms the earth. But I feel cold. Like ice, like nothing can warm me. Slowly, voices, pierce my mind, voices from outside, yet they do not completely pierce. I ignore them,at first.  
  
"W..why we gotta climb, ALL the way up here, MM?"  
  
MM:"Training, Kenku my man. we must be ready to fight Sigma,and KICK HIS BUTT!"  
  
Kenku:"Very well. Race ya!"  
  
His footsteps run faster, ahead of the first.  
  
MM:"Hey not fair!"  
  
  
  
He runs after Kenku.   
  
Kenku:"Life's no..."  
  
His voice trails off.  
  
MM:"Hey, whats wrong?"  
  
Kenku:"Theres a girl up here..."  
  
MM:"A girl, do you say? Is she pretty?"  
  
I feel Kenku's shadow fall over me, still I do not move. I don't wish to yet. IF I move..the spirit of darkness, the shadows within me, will wish ..to destroy once again. I feel this Kenku, wave his hand in front of my face.  
  
Kenku:"Hey, you OK? MM, I think shes hurt, or something, she won't move!"  
  
MM:"Coming!"  
  
Mm runs up, and stops. For a few long moments, there is silence.  
  
MM:"Holy Crap!"  
  
Kenku:"What? You look like you have seen a ghost."  
  
MM:"I DID! YOU DID! HER! SHES DEAD!"  
  
I feel Kenku put one hand on my neck, I think hes checking for my pulse.I hold back a growl, I don't like to be touched. Part of me wishes to spring, like a jungle cat, and rip his throat out.  
  
Kenku:"She..Shes alive!"  
  
MM:"Where the hell, as she been all this time???"  
  
Kenku:"You know her? Who is she?"  
  
MM:"That, my man, is Jen. Old friend of mine."  
  
Kenku:"Ah. I see now. The one thought dead. How'd she die?I mean, how do you think she died, cause shes clearly not dead."  
  
MM:"uh... never mind on that, Kenku."  
  
I feel MM approach me, he puts one hand on my shoulder, and it finally becomes to much for me. Their two close. Their warm hands burn. I snarl, under my breath, my eyes shoot open,and with a quick leap, I jump onto another rock, behind me.  
  
"Do, NOT touch me."  
  
Kenku jumps back, with a small yelp, and MM stares at me.  
  
MM:"Sorry, Homme. Long time no see."  
  
He seems at a loss for words, and I do not say anything in response.  
  
Kenku:"uh...I'm Kenku. You must be Jen, um you know MM."  
  
MM:"Course she dose, we are pals still, right Jen?"  
  
I stare at MM, then at Kenku. They fidget, clearly wondering why I act so strangly. MM finally can't take the silence any longer, and once again trys to speak to me.  
  
MM:"So, Jen, Were ya been?"  
  
I still do not answer, I mearly stand there, fingering my D-Tector. I yearn to escape this confrontation..But I fear I cannot do it, without bloodshed. But,why should I fear that? I must destroy..  
  
Kenku whispers softly to MM.  
  
Kenku:"Is she OK?"  
  
MM:"Sure! Sure she is. Come on, Jen. Stop playing around. Say your OK."  
  
I look at my feet, and pick up a rock, with a sharp edge. I finger it, twisting it around in the sunlight.  
  
Kenku:"So, uh, Jen, you have a Spirit?"  
  
I continue to look at the rock, not looking at the two DigiDesteind.  
  
"I am Duskmon. Spirit of Corrupted Darkness. I am Velgmon. Beast Spirit of Corrupted Darkness."  
  
MM:"uh, ok.I am Lowemon! Spirit of Darkness,and ..no beast spirit yet."  
  
Kenku:"And I am..nothing. No spirit here."  
  
I drop the rock, and raise my D-Tector up. With a quick flash, I transform to Duskmon. I withdraw my swords, holding them to the light. I see the blood on them, the Crimson blood that never fades. Can they see it as well?  
  
MM:"Nice, Jen. Why don't we go home, now? Its getting latish."  
  
I look at him.  
  
"I have no home."  
  
MM:"Jen, Don't be silly. Coarse ya do. Sure you been gone a long time, but home, is where the heart is."  
  
"I wish I had no heart."  
  
Kenku kinda fidgets, looking at MM.  
  
MM:"Jen?. Man your silly at times. You say the weirdest things."  
  
I look at my swords, and shine them into the sunlight.   
  
"Can you see the Crimson?"  
  
MM looks at me, puzzled, Kenku moves closer, and looks at my swords, then at me, in puzzlement.  
  
Kenku:"Your swords are very nice, but they are not crimson."  
  
MM:"Nope. Color of bone, I'd say."  
  
I bring one of the blades, to my face.   
  
"You can't see it, can you?"  
  
MM:"See what, Jen?"  
  
"The blood. The Crimson blood."  
  
Kenku starts back a bit, and MM just stares at me.  
  
Kenku:"BLOOD??"  
  
MM:"J..Jen??"  
  
Its clear I am starting to scare them. Good. I am not their friend. I am not their Jen. They should know this.  
  
"Yes. Blood. Sweet as honey, it eases pain, like a drug."  
  
MM:"What? Jen, have you gone nuts?"  
  
I laugh, I don't know why I do. I don't laugh. The sound of it, is chilling to my ears. Cold.  
  
Kenku starts to walk away.  
  
Kenku:"NO offense, MM, but your friends, slightly unwell."  
  
MM:"Jen! Get a grip, will ya?"  
  
His hand, goes to his D-Tector.  
  
I withdraw on of my swords, and raise my armored hand to the air, with one quick thrust of my other, I drive the first blade, into my hand, penetrating the armor around it. Kenku lets out a startled gasp, and MM raises his D-Tector.  
  
MM:"Jen! Are you waked or something?"  
  
Kenku:"She just drove her sword though her own hand. I think that should answer your question."  
  
Their conversation.. it sounds so strange. The way they look at me, the way their voices sound. I laugh, it just seems funny to me somehow. The two, back up a bit more.My laugh, sounds anything but jolly. I withdraw the sword from my hand, and look at MM. What dose he see, reflected in the cold eyes of Duskmon? A monster, A madman? Or dose his heart play tricks, dose he see his friend? I must know if he believes this.  
  
"You think, I am Jen?"  
  
Kenku:"uh.."  
  
MM:"Coarse you are. Who else would you be?"  
  
I move my swords, lowering them by my side.  
  
"I am not the Jen, that used to exist. That Jen, has long since fallen to shadows. I am what I am now."  
  
Kenku:"And what would that be?"  
  
Its clear to me, both Kenku and MM, continue to speak, to try and calm me. They don't know what else to do. They should run. They must not know yet.  
  
"A monster. One who seeks a end...."  
  
MM:"End to what? Don't tell me your gonna go jump off a cliff or something??"  
  
I look at him, ever so slowly, I raise one of my swords. I must end this quickly. Doubts of what i am doing, still linger. I must not let them sway me."  
  
"End to pain. End to my humanity. I seek to rid myself of this."  
  
I don't give him a chance to respond, I leap, my swords held high over my head, MM stumbles back, falling, to stunned to spirit evolve, as i descend down. A flash, Kenku.  
  
Kenku:"MM!"  
  
He leaps in the way, my swords pierce his chest, and stomach, his blood splatters on the ground, I pull back, slightly, he slumps off my swords, falling to the ground. His eyes flutter, ever so weakly, before going still. MM stares at Kenku, his hands shake, his eyes fill with anger.  
  
MM:"Jen! HOW COULD YOU? YOu ..you... ARE A MONSTER!"  
  
He holds up his D-Tector, He transforms to Lowemon. Twirling his staff, he charges me. I step aside, he stumbles past me, then turns on me again.  
  
Lowemon:"Final Meteor!"  
  
I let the attack hit me. To my surprise, I am barely affected. I am pushed back, a few steps, but that is all. How can that be? Am I that strong?   
  
Lowemon:"Grr, You once was my friend, Jen, but you will pay for Kenku's death! You will regret what path you have chosen."  
  
His voice, filled with anger, but also, regret. Why? Why feel regret for striking a monster. Why dose no one consider me that, yet?  
  
He runs at me again, striking at me with his staff. I raise my sword, blocking it. I look into his eyes, I can't stand it anymore. His feelings, torment me.   
  
"Deadly Gaze"  
  
The lasers strike him, point blank range. Lowemon is thrown back, nearly off the cliff, he De-Spirit evolves to MM. I leap, and am by him in a instant. I raise my sword, preparing to plunge it into his heart."  
  
MM:"w..why.."  
  
I don't answer. Why do people keep asking me, why? Pain, is that not enough of a answer? They can't feel, or imagine, what I feel. They can't know, my agony.  
  
I raise the sword higher, then plunge it down, a insistent before it hits, a red clawed hand grabs my sword.I look up, into Flamedramon's eyes. No.. Not him. It can't be. I am not ready, to face him yet. Flamedramon stares at me, and I hear footsteps behind me. I turn my head, and as I knew it, he is there. Dave. He just looks at me, his eyes are so... filled with pain. Yet.. determination. He'll stop me. Long ago, I was his friend, but now, I slay the innocent. He must stop me.  
  
Dave:"Jen. Turn from this path. There is still time."  
  
I hear it in his voice. He has not much hope, for me. A little, not much, but a little. More then I have, more then I have had, for a long time.  
  
"Time, is something I ran out of, long ago. There is no time. There is no redemption, nor hope."  
  
Dave:"Jen. You believe that? Truly? Believe what you have done is.."  
  
"The darkness consumes me. And I seek it, now. I seek the darkness, to consume all I was."  
  
I raise my swords. Outside, I am ready for this battle, Inside, I am not.  
  
Dave:"You, leave me with no choice, Jen. You know, what I must do. You know, you threaten this world, and the DigiDestinds."  
  
He grips his Digivice, still staring at me. Flamedramon leaps, I turn to him, raising my swords up.  
  
Flamedramon:"Fire..."  
  
A shot out of nowhere, hits him. Flamedramon goes flying, hitting the cliff wall by Dave, De-Digivolving to Veemon. I look up into the sky. Sigma. He lands, by us.  
  
Dave:"Sigma."  
  
Sigma:"Leave her. She's not ready, to fight you, to kill you yet."  
  
A brief flash of shock, registers in his eyes, but he covers it quickly.   
  
Dave:"What have you done to her, Sigma?"  
  
Sigma:"Nothing. She came to me, of her own free will."  
  
Dave:"I refuse to believe, you did not have some game, or part."  
  
He Denys. They all deny. I look at the ground, De-Spirit Evolving.   
  
"He speaks the truth, Dave."  
  
Dave glances at me, then back at Sigma.  
  
Dave:"Jen. Why?"  
  
A hint of anger, is behind his words.  
  
"I seek release from pain. He can give it to me."  
  
Sigma:"She wishes, to be rid of her human emotions. It is her decision."  
  
Dave:"Jen. You can't. Do you know who Sigma is??"  
  
More anger, in his voice.  
  
"I know."  
  
He looks at me. His gaze, so full of anger. Yet, still, a hint of sorrow.   
  
Sigma:"This is not a battle, for today."  
  
I touch my D-Tector, then quickly Beast Spirit Evolve. Memory's of the past, are beginning to flash in my minds eye. I hope for the blackness. And I am not disappointed. The shadows cover my eyes..the last thing I see, is Dave, with Veemon in his arms and MM slug across his shoulder,leaving.. for now. They will come for me. I am their enemy now. I feel.. almost sad. Then, the shadows cover me completely. 


	12. Chapter 12The Last Reach of Friendship

Chapter 12-The Last Reach of Friendship  
  
I rise from the shadows, from the black, as I aways do, but something is wrong this time. I think, puzzled. What is different? I shift my eyes, wondering what is different. I look at the window, the sky outside is black. How long as the darkness taken me, this time? How long? It feels longer then a few hours..It feels like much longer. I raise my head, the sound of footsteps. Sigma. I look at him.  
  
"How long?"  
  
He looks at me, do I really expect him to answer? I am nothing to him.. He mearly has interest in me, for who I am, and the darkness, I have allowed to take hold within me.   
  
Sigma:"Does it mater, Shadow?"  
  
I shrug..does it? Why do I care, what happens when I blackout? Why should I? Why does the blackouts, concern me so much as of late? As I think, I realize something else. More of the pain..has eased from me. I think of Vegeta, and somehow, the thought of him, is not as sharp, in fact.. Some of what I felt of my partner, is also gone.   
  
Sigma:"A week, Shadow."  
  
My head bolts up. A week? How is that possible. I clench my eyes shut, no memory's, not the faintest glimmer, or the briefest flash, pass though my head. I open my eyes again, and get up. I don't ask for what happened from, him. I know he won't give me the answers I seek. What have I done? A week.. Longer then ever. I turn my back on Sigma, I start to walk out.  
  
Sigma:"Leaving so soon, Shadow? I would hate to think, your getting...cold feet."  
  
He laughs. I realize, I really hate that sound. I don't answer, I just walk out. He dose not follow. Once outside, I raise my head, to the cold night air, then let the transformation take me. Velgmon. I must know. I fly, into the night sky, the faint lights of the stars, glimmering on my wings. I fly, northward, silent as shadows. I must know.   
  
"Why did the darkness, take me for so long? Was he responsible, for the length? Somehow?"  
  
A hour later, I reach my destination. I look down,no one has seen me. DigiDestened Base. I can't possibly get inside..Can I? I land, in the shadows and transform to Duskmon. With a quick leap, I am on the roof. I look around, and see a gaping hole in the roof. I wonder, how this happened? I approach it, it looks to be, from some explosion, I look down, seeing only blackness, I leap. I feel a slight tingle, almost that of pain, as I enter. But nothing else. I am in. I stay in the shadows, moving though the base. Then, voices. I look quickly, seeing a air vent, I Leap to it, De-Spirit to Jen, and enter. I close it behind me, and sit, quietly. I look out, I see them. Two I recognize. They seem to be arguing. One, is Cj. One who used to chase after me. I did not like, when boys pursued me. The other, Cat. They stop, I touch my D-Tector. Have they seen me? But, as they continue to talk, I realize they have not.   
  
Cj looks around, then looks at Cat.  
  
Cj:"Good, no ones around."  
  
Cat:"Why don't you want others to know? We should tell them of our plan!"  
  
Cj takes Cat's hand, and shakes his head.  
  
Cj:"NO! THEY Can't know. Do you Understand???"  
  
Cat:"I guess so..but why?"  
  
Cj:"They have given up. Jesus. Given up on her.. she was so much apart of this place! Of US. And they don't even want to TRY to talk to her!"  
  
Cat:"Dave tried, Kazin tried."  
  
Cj:"NOT hard enough! She...the Jen WE knew, HAS to be in there! I won't believe shes not. I CAN REACH HER. I can bring her back."  
  
Cat fidgets a bit, then sniffles.  
  
Cat:"B..but she killed.. Duo. And Dragoon and.."  
  
Cat starts to cry, ever so lightly.  
  
Cat:"And EternaL.."  
  
Cj:"I know that! I know she also killed GT and WarriorShark0.. When they were training..She struck at them, with no warning!"  
  
I feel part of myself go slightly numb. Those..Were who I killed, who I could not even REMEMBER killing?  
  
Cat:"What if she kills Freya? Or Zara, or Dave, or YOU or everyone else??!!?"  
  
CJ:"Shh. I know. I know, but Sigma, he must somehow be behind this! He must of done something to her, like he did with Mark!"  
  
My eyes narrow. Why do they deny the truth, that is right before them? Why? Why cannot they accept the fact, I am the way I am, not because of Sigma, but because I let the shadows consume me, long before I met up with Sigma.  
  
~let the hatred consume you.~  
  
I clench my teeth, almost speaking. Another voice, from the past. But, perhaps it was right. I close my eyes, I pray for darkness. I clutch my D-Tector. Am I ready? Ready to spill blood in the DigiDestined Base? But dose it mater? If I do, or don't? I have ... So many has my blades, and wings, has taken. Finally, its to much to take. I leap out of the airduct, transforming to Duskmon, I land in front of Cj, and Cat. Cat utters a small shriek, and hides behind Cj, CJ, looks at me."  
  
Cj:"JEN!"  
  
I look at him.   
  
"Forget it. Forget me. It is not Sigma, that led me to darkness."  
  
Cj:"Jen, it IS. IT has to be!"  
  
My eyes flare, WHY WON'T THEY ACCEPT??? I raise my sword,and with a quick swing, I slash Cj's face, he startles back, falling, Cat dives out of the way. Cj slowly gets up, his eyes shocked..as he touches the wound on his face, his fingers come back, crimson. Cat looks at me.  
  
Cat:"WHY DID YOU DO THAT??? WHY???? WHY DID YOU KILL ETERNAL, AND DUO, AND THE REST???? WHY??"  
  
"Accept it. I am darkness, forever more, beyond saving. I do what I do, to ease the pain."  
  
Cj grabs Cat's arm.  
  
Cj:"Calm down! Jen, I don't believe, I'll NEVER believe I can't reach you! I'll never let them kill you, or hurt you!"  
  
Cat shrugs Cj's hand off, glaring at me, shaking, crying.  
  
I glance at her, then focus my eyes, on CJ.  
  
"You can't protect me. You failed in ever effort to protect me, before. It was you, who tried to protect me, from the Demon."  
  
Cj looks down, clenching his teeth.  
  
Cj:"I won't fail again!"  
  
"Its to late."  
  
I raise my swords.  
  
Cj grips his D-Tector, then slowly, he drops it. It hits the floor, with a bang.  
  
Cj:"I won't fight you. IF you can, strike me down. But I know you can't. Jen, never would."  
  
Cat starts to move, Cj, once again, stops her.  
  
Cj:"Don't worry. Shes JEN. She can't hurt me. she won't.  
  
Cat fidgets, but stands still.  
  
Fool. He believes that? Any feelings, for any of my friends, has vanished in the mist! Or.. almost has... I lower my swords. Hes defenseless..he NO! I am not weak, I must let the darkness consume me. The pain! I growl softly, then close my eyes.  
  
Cj:"She can't do it. I know sh.."  
  
He stops, as I growl. I .. Its to late for me. Whats a couple more? Soon it will be much more then that, and these stupid human emotions, that have pained me, for so long, will vanish! I growl again, then in lighting speed, I plunge my sword, though his heart. He looks at me, his eyes in shock, in.. No..his eyes. I glance away, as I pull my sword from him, and he slumps ot the ground, dead. His blood, pooling on the floor.  
  
"...why did he not believe?"  
  
Cat lets out a wail, of pure grief and anger, then She raises her D-Tector into the air.  
  
Cat:"You were my FRIEND, but your not anymore! YOU KILLED MY FRIENDS!"  
  
She spirit evolves to Kazemon, runs at me, screaming. I grab her by the throat. Slowly, I tighten my grip, she struggles, her struggles growing weaker.   
  
Kazemon:"..why?"  
  
A streak flashes by me, someone slams into me, hard. I drop Cat, and swing my swords, the figure leaps back.   
  
Kazemon, DeDigivolves to Cat, who coughs, weakly.  
  
Cat:"Woc..."  
  
Woc looks at her.  
  
Woc:"Get out of here. I'll finish this."  
  
Cat looks at him, then at Cj's still form, and runs off.  
  
Woc:"Jen. I should of known, you'd fall. I could sense your darkness, from the start. Your darkness, will end here."  
  
A orange flash, soars past the hole, in the roof, and I feel a large clawed hand, grab me, and throw me outside the base. I somersault, landing on my feet, facing WarGreymon. Woc's partner. Woc leaps beside his partner, his eyes glaring at me.   
  
Woc:"The others, may have difficulty in doing what is Nessisisary, but know this. I will NOT hesitate to strike you down, on this night. May you find the peace you seek, in death."  
  
"What peace, can there be, for a monster? In life, or death? There is no, light for me, not now,not ever."  
  
Woc:"Believe what you will. You will die this night. I cannot evil such as you,exist."  
  
He nods at WarGreymon, WarGreymon looks at him, and nods, then leaps toward me.  
  
WarGreymon:"Mega Claw!"  
  
I raise my Swords over my head, WarGreymon's claws, clash on my blades, I dig my heels into the ground.  
  
"Deadly Gaze!"  
  
My lasers strike out, hitting WarGreymon, he flys backward, crashing into the ground. He quickly, bounds up.   
  
Woc looks around, seeing other DD's gathering, watching this fight.  
  
Woc:"End this quickly, We must."  
  
WarGreymon raises his claws over his head, a huge glowing gold ball forming.   
  
WarGreymon:"TerraForce!!!!!!"  
  
I swing my swords out to the side.  
  
"Slide Evolution!"  
  
My swords vanish, replaced by wings, as I transform to Velgmon. I take to the air, and throw myself at the TerraDestroyer. I focus my power, my strength, as my wings wrap around the attack. The force of it, threatens to tear my wings from my body, but I won't let it! My wings glow, and I strike out at the ball, a strange dark energy glows around it, and with one beat of my wings, I throw it, right at the DigiDestiend base. I hear the screams of those who watch, Woc's eyes widen and WarGreymon leaps into the air, trying to catch it, before it slams into the base.   
  
WarGreymon:"P..Partner, I ..I ..I can't hold it!"  
  
I see Woc look around...dose he really feel concern for others? I seem not to. He lowers his head.  
  
Woc:"We must save them."  
  
WarGreymon:"I understand, my partner!"  
  
Wargreymon's claws form, another TerraForce gathering, but this time, there is no place for the energy's to go..WarGreymon shoots into the air, with both..and a huge flash of light, is seen in the air. When it fades, WarGreymon, and the destructive energy, is no more.   
  
Woc lowers his head.  
  
Woc:"We shall meet again, someday. In this life, or the next."  
  
I flair my wings, and transform into Duskmon. Before Woc, or anyone else has a chance to react, I leap, landing by Woc.  
  
"You will meet, your partner, sooner then you expect."  
  
The venom from my voice, surprises me. Why to I feel this way? I ignore, it, driving my sword into his Chest. He raises his head, ever so slightly.  
  
Woc:"You..are a fool.. You.. could of been diff rent.. stupid..."  
  
His eyes roll back, and he hits the ground. The other Digidestineds, stare at me. Some I know. Some I don't. And then, I see her. Freya. She moves closer to me, shrugging off the other DigiDestinds. She moves, a mere 5 feet in front of me, and slowly shakes her head.  
  
Freya:"Jen, you gotta wake up."  
  
I look at her.  
  
"There is no waking up for me. Give up. Give up hope, that any part of the Jen you knew, still exists. She is gone. "  
  
I look away from Freya. I must leave. Before the darkness claims me. I want to remember what I do.. I don't want not to know.. I scream, why, I am unsure, They jump back, as I transform to Velgmon, and take to the night air, I fly, as fast as my wings can take me, away from that place. 


	13. Chapter 13Curtain Pulled Back, Horrors R...

Chapter 13-Curtain Pulled Back, Horrors Reviled  
  
Strangely enough, the blackness does not come, right away. I land, transforming back to me, I lean against the wall,eyes closed, lightly shaking. I try to stop, but can't, even when his footsteps approach me.   
  
"Just... Go away."  
  
Do I really think,he will Liston to me? But of course, he dose not.  
  
Sigma:"Shadow. You are failing.. You should of destroyed them all!"  
  
I shake my head.  
  
"No.. I .."  
  
Sigma:"Yes. I understand, Shadow. You are still to weak to do so. Your emotions, get the better of you.  
  
I growl softly, clenching my eyes more tightly.  
  
"They won't go away."  
  
Sigma:"It takes time. Still.."  
  
He laughs.. why does he laugh. Does he find this funny?   
  
Sigma:"Perhaps, Shadow, Its time you find out, what you are like, when the blackouts take you!"  
  
I jerk my head up, opening my eyes to stare at him. What does he mean? I know how I am like. Out of control, wild, my human emotions, almost completely buried. As if reading my thoughts, he speaks again.  
  
Sigma:"Almost? More like, completely. Lets have a little lesson, shall we?"  
  
His eyes glow, and soon we are surrounded by glowing energy's, when they fade, we are standing in the real world, in a dirty alleyway. I look around, growling slightly. Why has he brought me back here? I can here sounds of people, nearby.  
  
Sigma:"Be happy, Shadow. I am giving you a gift. "  
  
Gift? What is he talking about? I shake my head, feeling the familiar darkness start to take hold. What is his point? I don't remember what I do, when I blackout. Just little bits.  
  
Sigma moves in front of me, and his eyes glow.  
  
Sigma:"Go, Shadow. Loose yourself to the darkness."  
  
"What did you do??"  
  
Sigma moves backward, slowly fading into the shadows.  
  
Sigma:"You shall see, Shadow. You shall see."  
  
I close my eyes, the darkness fading over my eyes. I feel myself change to Duskmon, and then all is black.  
  
I hear drops of liquid, water? I feel wetness on my hands. My eyes flicker open. Again, the darkness. I look at my hands, and recall in shock. Blood, they are covered.. in blood. But I am not Duskmon.. I feel drops of liquid running down my face, they smell the same as my hands. What has happened?   
  
"What, have I done? What has happened?"  
  
And as soon as I utter those words.. I remember. But, the memory's are not just snippets, or flash. I remember it all, I feel it all, It is as if I am there, reliving every single moment.  
  
Earlier  
  
------  
  
I leap from building to building, moving closer to the sounds of people. They sound happy. Why should they be HAPPY? I growl softly. Its not fair. They will SUFFER! As I have suffered. I leap onto the next building, and stare down. A mall. Busy, bustling. Full of prey. Should I be Velgmon? No. My blades.. I leap onto the mall roof, and stare down, though the skylight. Burning hatred, fills my soul, for the happy people. Oh so happy, it was not fair! I should be happy! Why should they be happy, and not me! I scream, raising my head to the night sky. I WILL be happy, even if this, is the only thing that makes me happy. Ridding others of their pitiful happy life's. I leap though the skylight, with at tremendous crash, and land, in front of them. They stare at me, shocked. Afraid. I laugh, and raise my blades. A few people scream, but they continue, to stare. Star at ME? Brave, or foolish,f or staring at this dark warrior in the face? Their voices. I here there voices. The sound sickens me.  
  
Voices:"What is that? Oh my god, are those swords?? Cool Holy Sh-- I think thats the thing thats been killing people!!!"  
  
My eyes move, who first, then I see him. A security guard, approaching. Oh yes. Hes doing his job, his happy little job. I leap, to the startled gasps of the crowd, and land by him. Brining my sword up, I plunge it at his chest. He attempts to block, but my blade, goes right though his arm,to his chest. Blood splashes onto the ground, as I withdraw my sword, letting him fall.   
  
Voices:"That monster! Holy sh-- we gotta get out of here! RUN!"  
  
The sounds of screams.. The smell of blood.. Not enough. I NEED MORE. I leap to the nearest person, he starts to run, falls instead. I look at him, the fear in his eyes, then slash my sword down, across his throat. More screams. Farther away now. They flee. I want them. I leap into the air, my blades flashing.  
  
"Deadly Gaze!"  
  
My lasers shoot out, again and again, throughout the mall. People utter brief screams, before falling dead. Not enough, not enough blood, not enough! I fire my attack again, this time, I aim lower, my lasers going though their legs, non lethal. Some fall, struggling to get up. Some continue to run. I grin and walk to one of the fallen.  
  
"Why are you so happy?"  
  
The girl, whimpers at me, trying to move away.  
  
Girl"...help, SOMEONE HELP ME!"  
  
She fails to answer my question. I grab her by the throat, and twist, the sound of her neck snapping reverberating in my ears. A shout, behind me, I look, to see another. I drop the girl, and spin around, my blades flashing. They slice though his stomach, he falls, blood spurting out, on the ground, over my blades. I look around, more, I MUST have more! Again, and again my blades flash out, how many times, I can't count. The mall floor, covered with blood. Body's strewn, lying still, never to be happy anymore! I continue to move, looking for more prey. I MUST have more! Suddenly, a shout.  
  
"DAMN YOU!"  
  
I feel someone slam into me, we both fall backward, though a glass window, it shatters, I leap up, finding myself in a weapon shop of sorts. Knifes, swords, decorate the wall. The customers, inside, look at me, in shock, before trying to flee. But there is only once exit. And they dare not flee past me. I look at the man, who has slammed into me. I raise my blades.  
  
Man:"You monster! What kind of thing are you!? Your not human!"  
  
I laugh, he thinks me not human? But of coarse, why would they? Suddenly, I have the desire, to show them. SHOW them the truth, I am human! And I will destroy them, for being happy. I laugh again, as the spirit of darkness fades, leaving .. what some would call, just a girl. The man looks at me in shock. I place my hand on the counter, I feel a blade beneath it.  
  
"Am I a thing? Or am I human?"  
  
I grip the knife and quickly spring forward, plunging it into the mans throat. Blood spays out, covering my hands, spraying on my face. The warmth of it.. the man falls backward. I laugh, then stop, as I feel a flash of dull pain, in my back. I barely feel it. I turn around, to see the shopkeeper, holding another knife, it drips with blood. My blood.  
  
"Strangely, I barely felt that."  
  
The shopkeeper looks at me, in shock, he should react faster. I leap onto the counter, and kick him in the face, he falls behind the counter, on the floor. I leap down, driving the knife into his stomach, more blood, so much crimson blood. Something hits, near me, shatters. The other customers are trying to save themselves. I know I should be Duskmon, but I don't want to. I want to show them. I look around, then drive my fist though one of the glass cabinets, the glass slices though my hand, my blood leaks down. I ignore, and grab what I seek, ignoring as the sharp ends of the throwing stars, cut me. I look up, and with a quick twist throw them. The customers leap aside, but the stars, find one target, they gasp, as the 3 stars I threw, make contact, with their neck. They gasp, slumping the the ground. THe others, now try to flee, try to run past me, to the door. I growl, NO, they should NOT be allowed to escape. I leap on the first one, raking my fingernails across their eyes, they scream, and fall, I fall with them, driving the dagger I still hold, into their throat, their blood, also covers me. A scream.then a shout.  
  
Women:"You..."  
  
She almost hisses at me, it seems, I don't notice, the sword until its to late. She swings it, it slices across my face. I spring up, and put one hand, to my face, feeling the blood. I look at the women, and grin, she backs away, holding the sword in front of her. Does she really believe,that will save her. I hiss, and throw my dagger at her, she trys to block, the sword falling out of her hands. I leap forward, my legs sweep out sending her falling to the ground, I grab the sword, my hand slippery with blood, and plunge it into her stomach, twisting. She screams, and then, another, behind me. I feel another slash, to the back of my arm, I growl, and twist around, swinging my sword, moving so fast, swinging so hard, the blade goes clean though his neck, his head falls, blood spraying on me, as his body falls. I turn back to the women, but pause. Dizzy.. I feel as if I am in a dream, ready to wake up. NO! NOT NOW! I growl, and drop the sword, and run out of the store. I run, and run,to the back exit, the few people that still remain in the mall, stare after me, me the girl covered in crimson red blood. I run though the night, ducking into a abandoned warehouse and then..then I wake up.  
  
Now  
  
-----  
  
I sit there, my eyes in shock, they fall to my hands.. crimson soaked hands. I just stare at them, for long minutes, barely blinking, not moving. This... this is what i DID when I blacked out? Destroy..KILL people, and enjoy it?? How.. How could this be?   
  
"Trick..must ...b...be trick"  
  
His voice, again.   
  
Sigma:"No trick. No lies. The heart of what you are, truly comes out, when darkness takes you.  
  
He laughs, I don't look at him. I want to deny, to say, he must of done something, but as I sit there, I start to remember. All the times I blacked out, all the times.. the images that fill my head, shock me. Horrify me. But they also, show me the truth. I am a monster. I have been since the first blackout took me. And I let it. I embrace the darkness, I wished for it, deep inside to cover me. I let, what happens after, take me.  
  
Sigma:"You realize now. Come, Shadow. Let us go home. The time, to destroy the world, is almost at hand. And then, you shall be freed, of any lingering humanity!"  
  
He turns his back. I could stay there..refuse to go..but why? There is truly nothing left for me now. I slowly get up, and follow. 


	14. Chapter 14Numbness

Chapter 14-Numbness  
  
A few nights later  
  
----------  
  
I run though the night my eyes flashing, for any sign of movement. My swords are out, by my side...ready. Why is there no prey? But I know why. They hide. They hide from me. There is no more trying to reason with me. No more trying to reach me. They knew, now, none of the Jen they knew, long ago, exists. She is gone. All that is left is me. A girl covered in darkness, bathed in blood. Wracked, still, with pain and guilt. I wonder, when I help sigma destroy this world, when I become a demon, will I be different, even more so?  
  
"Different.."  
  
I stop, hissing slightly under by breath, remembering. Remembering what Sigma showed me. How he pierced the darkness around me. How he reviled what happened when i black out. The Jen, that exists deep within me, that was unleashed in the dark. THe Jen that killed, innocent and guilt alike, and reveled in it!That enjoyed the feel of blood on her swords, and hands. The Jen...that felt no pain. No eternal agony. No guilt. No.. No love, or compassion. THAT Jen was completely free of the weak emotions I wished to rid myself of.   
  
"I never knew..That Jen already existed, deep within me."  
  
I grow, low, deep. Was that what i truly wished to become? Vegeta... A piercing pain strikes my heart, as it aways dose, when I think of my lost partner. But the pain, is less then it used to be. When I become a demon, there will be no more pain, when I think of Vegeta, or any others i have lost. But nether will there be love. I'll never care for anything...anyone, ever again.  
  
~But you will be free, Shadow.~  
  
His voice. Echoing in my head. Somehow he is aways nearby, when lingering doubts pierce my heart.  
  
"Free..."  
  
Free of pain, Free of the hell I found myself in ever since Vegeta died...even before that. Free of the nightmares that plague my sleep. Free. Something I have sought, for so long. Something I have killed for. How many life's, have I taken? How many?  
  
~Many Shadow. Many, many, many.~  
  
His laugh, also echos in my head.  
  
~Enough, that in the Real World, they call you a mass murder, guilt of so many deaths. Here, your old friends, they call you, a monster. You have taken the first transformation into becoming a demon. Soon, it will be time. Time to destroy this world. And then, you will be granted, freedom. Demonhood.~  
  
"A Monster."  
  
Yes. A monster, is what i now was. I look at my swords, crimson ever reflecting in my mind's eye. I could not escape the crimson on my blades, my wings, my hands.   
  
"Yes. I am a monster, now."  
  
~Yes Shadow. Revel in this, and what you will become!~  
  
I lower my head slightly. The old Jen, ..she was so different then me.  
  
~Shadow! Remember how you felt in the mall. Remember the pleasure you got, in taking their life's!~  
  
I growl softly.   
  
"I..am not that Jen."  
  
~Are you that much a fool, Shadow!? That Jen, IS You. That you, was born of your hatred, of your pain. The lust to destroy, those who are happy, who have not yet suffered as you have!~  
  
My eyes, close. Yes. She is me. Me, stripped of all my human emotions, stripped of any hesitation to hurt others. All that is left, when I am her, is my anger, my hatred, my darkness.   
  
"Yes. But is it....right to take such pleasure?"  
  
~Why not, Shadow? Whys hould others be spared the pain you h ave been forced to endure? Ones LESS then you, less deserving, have been spared of the the pain, you have gone though. Why you, you who fought for the miserable world, was not spared. Tell me Shadow, is that fair?~  
  
I shake my head, my eyes flaring open. No. No it was not. Why should I of had to suffer? WHY? I scarified so much for this damn world, and what do I get? Betray, pain never ending!  
  
"Its..not...fair"  
  
I roar, letting out all my anger, my hatred, my pain.  
  
~Thats it, Shadow! GIVE in to the hatred, completely! Let yourself start to be reborn! When we destroys this world, you will rise from the ashes, like a phoenix,i reborn as a demon!!! And Every world, will fear you, and suffer as you have suffered!~  
  
I roar again, letting the hatred and darkness wash over me, let it consume me! Let the darkness completely overwhelm me, LET ME BE FREE! A dark energy surrounds me, as I roar into the night air. My spirit burns, my blades feel like red hot knifes in my hands. I roar again and again, as the darkness washes over me. The blackness, once again takes over.  
  
But this time...  
  
I am awake.   
  
I start to run again.  
  
My head bolts up, my eyes focus ahead of me. Two small figure, in the far distance. Prey? I run faster, sliding to Velgamon. I fly over the figure, my dark shadow passing over him. The two stop, look up. I stare down, into the eyes of a AllForceVeedramon, then, the Digidesteind next to him. Zeroku. He mearly watches me, above him, a smirk on his face. Smirk? Why? He must know..of course he does. He was aways darker then the others. I twist in midair, again changing, this time back to Duskmon. I land before him, and AllForce.  
  
Zeroku:"Why hello Jen. How are we today?"  
  
I stare at him, such calm. Is he not trembling. I raise my blade, ever so slightly. Zeroku's partner tenses up.  
  
"Why do you not fear me?"  
  
Zeroku shrugs slightly.  
  
Zeroku:"Why? You and I, we are alike. I'm evil to."  
  
I laugh, this little boy, evil? He was aways a wannabee, giving love sick eyes, to the demon Bai Tzai.  
  
"You, are not evil."  
  
Zeroku:"Yes I am. I believe in Lord Sigma."  
  
I raise my blade higher.  
  
"Have you tasted the blood of innocents? Have you slain as many as I have?"  
  
Zeroku:"Not yet, but I will! Kill all those mother fuggen weaklings."  
  
I slowly smile..this little boy, is nothing. He will never kill, and I will never give him the chance. Before he can react, I spring forward, my blade piercing AllForceVeedra's chest. The mighty dragon's data flickers, as he struggles against the blade. Zeroku stares at me in shock.  
  
Zeroku:"You B----!"  
  
I mearly laugh, my eyes glow..as my deadly gaze streaks forward hitting AllForceVeedramon..he bursts into data, before Zeroku's's eyes.   
  
"Charge me. Attack me. You know you want to."  
  
Zeroku hisses at me.  
  
Zeroku:"You.."  
  
I narrow my eyes, and grab him by the neck.  
  
"Little boy. You do not know true darkness, nor could you. I AM DARKNESS, devoured by it!"  
  
I plunge my sword into his stomach, he gasps, blood spurting onto the ground. I drop him, and raise the blade to my face, looking down upon him.  
  
"For thinking you were even close to darkness, I leave you here. To die. Slowly."  
  
My words, slightly shock me. I sound..Cruel. But what does it mater anymore? After all I have done, all the life I have taken, my emotions are less then they were..slowly they are being devoured by darkness. I am a monster. I will be a demon. After that, nothing else matters.  
  
I leap into the air, transforming into Velgamon, a voice, his voice, echos in my head.  
  
"Shadow. It is time."  
  
Time...Time to destroy, time to be reborn, time for what little human emotions I have, to vanish, like the morning dew.  
  
"Shadow..Come."  
  
I see a picture in my head, clouds, darkness, high up in the sky of the Digital World. I tilted my wings, heading up into the atmosphere, to my destiny, I supposes. Lingering doubts still plagued my thoughts, but I pushed them away. They were human, they were of what I used to be, long long ago. THey were irreverent. The past was gone, any happiness I felt back then, was gone. 


	15. Chapter 15The Begining of the End

Chapter 15-The Begining of the End  
  
As I soar up into the sky my eyes fall downward, I can't seem to help myself, and suddenly, it hits me. This is the last time I will ever look down at the Digital World, which was once my home. The only place, I had ever felt at home at. The only place that I had found people who cared for me ...my family. The only place, I had found, for such a brief time, peace.  
  
But that peace was gone, shattered. The past was nothing more then a distant memory, dreams long faded. All that was left was the nightmare. The people that had once been my friends, and this world, meant nothing to me now, but pain. I searched my soul, then and there, and, for the first time, I was not meet with a intense blast of pain, and old feelings of the past. This time there was only a strange numbness.  
  
All I had done, the people, some once friends, I had killed, the crimson blood that resulted...had covered the emotions that had held me back, that had kept me from truly being a monster, and keep the pain razor sharp. Pain. Once it had consumed me, cut me, my every waking moment since Vegeta died filled with unending pain. Suffering so great it caused me to seek death..to slaying the guilty, for the feel of blood on my blades. Agony so deep it caused me to black out, to slaughter innocents...to enjoy it. The pain of the guilty and innocent alike soothing my own pain.  
  
That pain, once like a razor sharp blade, was now more like a dull knife, and soon, it would be gone completely. Sigma, could completely release me from it. He had already helped me dull it, he drew back the curtain from my eyes.From the blackouts. Once he did that, there was no going back, not that there ever was. When Vegeta died, I lost part of myself, and I lost everything else. No one ever did understand that, understand my pain. And some of those, had died, for not understanding the depths I had sunk.  
  
I flew higher and higher, the air growing colder over my wins,a nd soon, I see it. A platform floating in midair, a single figure stands upon it, waiting. I swoop down, transforming to Jen. I drop down, by Sigma's side, slightly shivering in the cold thin air. For a few moments, he does not speak, mearly looks down at the Digital World, I look to, it seems expected.  
  
Sigma:"What do you see, Shadow?"  
  
I start to answer, then pause. What do I see now? I do not know, but he seems to want a answer.  
  
"I see...."  
  
Sigma:"Yes Shadow?"  
  
"I see pain. Suffering. Yet I also see people being happy, even though this pain and suffering."  
  
Sigma:"Its not fair, is it Shadow? That they never suffer as you have suffered."  
  
I stare down, not answering, I feel Sigma move closer to me, he puts his hand, on my shoulder.  
  
Sigma:"They care nothing for you, or your pain. Your agony, your loss, means zero to them. All they care about is that such did not happen to them."  
  
I clench my fist, my eyes narrow. They had their partners. They were happy!I was denied that. Denied my partner! Death..pain..suffering. That is all fate had handed me.  
  
"Its...Not....Fair!"  
  
Sigma:"But of coarse it is not, Shadow. Did you really expect the fates to be so kind to you? They never are. They reward less deserving people with happiness, and reward the truly deserving, with pain. Everyone should be punished for this, for your pain. They should suffer as you have suffered.  
  
I again do not answer, just stand there shaking, slowly, I step closer to the edge, and for a moment, I think of jumping, ending it once and for all. Then, I feel Sigma pulling me away from the edge, he stands now in front of me.  
  
Sigma:"Shadow. Jump and they will never suffer, never know your pain. You will suffer, straight to hell and beyond, and they will not. Do you really want that?  
  
I slowly shake my head no, clenching my hands, so tightly my fingernails pierce my skin, blood welling out, making my palms sticky.  
  
Sigma:"See?"  
  
He raises his hand to my face, touching the healing wound, from when the women struck at me with the blade, at the mall.  
  
Sigma:"Soon, Shadow. All last doubts you have, and human emotions will be gone. We will be great together, Shadow. Together, we will plunge this entire universe into fear, and pain,and suffering. So much will we destroy."  
  
He draws his cold metal hand down he enter length of the mark on my face, I turn my head slightly away.  
  
Sigma:"Shadow. Do you wish it healed? Al marks, wounds, scares, will remain when you transform. If you wish for your face to remain unmarked.."  
  
I growl softly, interrupting him.  
  
"Why do you care?"  
  
Sigma withdraws his hand, his eyes narrowing slightly.  
  
Sigma:'Just the point you still have not realized, Shadow. I don't care. My only cares are only for causing as much pain, suffering, and death as I can. I only offer you this, because, there is no going back. DECIDE NOW"  
  
I growl again, shouting back at him.  
  
"I do not wish it gone, I wish it DEEPENED!"  
  
I do not know why I utter these words, but the instant I do, I know it is my wish, perhaps my last once, as a human.   
  
Sigma seems to see this in my eyes, and before I can so much as blink, Sigma withdraws a glowing blade, that seems to scream with crys of tormented souls. The blade of agony. Before I can so much as take another breath, he slashes the blade across my face, exactly where the healing wound runs down. A wave of intense pain hits me, I feel myself almost blacking out. My eyes start to roll back in my head. I stumble, feeling Sigma catch me before I fall. A few moments pass, what feels like a eternity to me, as I struggle to breath, to stop myself from blacking out completely. Slowly the pain eases. I open my eyes, and stand. Slowly I touch my face with my hand, expecting to feel blood, but all I feel is the scar, its closed, healed, already, all that is left is the scar, which I shall were eternal.  
  
Sigma:"Shadow. Call that, your final test. Any mortal not completely seeped in darkness would of died. You live, and your wish is done. Now, it is almost time.  
  
I breath deeply, dropping my hand. Time.  
  
"When?"  
  
Sigma:"When the sun rises, we will begun their doom Shadow. On the rising rays of blood red dawn, the last sunrise, the Digital World will ever see!"  
  
Sigma falls silent, mearly watching the horizon, awaiting the dawn. I, to, do not speak, mearly waiting, for the end, for the beginning, for change, and complete release of pain. 


	16. Chapter 16To End it All

Chapter 16-To End it All  
  
The cold hours before dawn slowly pass, we both wait, in silence, as the time passes. And then, the first faint rays of light, streak across the horizon, slowly turning the clouds red. The rays of first morning light, are blood red.   
  
Sigma:"It is time, Shadow. Do you have any last doubts?"  
  
I slowly shake my head, what doubts can I have, that would mater? I had gone to far to darkness, I was darkness, and the final step, awaited me. After this.. everything would change. Pain would be that of the past, and my past, could finally just be that. It would not haunt me, pain me so. Nightmares would no longer plague me, instead I would give the nightmares.. the pain, the suffering.   
  
Sigma:"Good."  
  
He looks at me, slowly smirking, then flys into the air. Slowly his form glows brighter and brighter, changing. Huge demon wings sprout from his back, his armor hardens, taking on a bronze glow, all the demon weapons, glow brightly.  
  
Sigma:"Behold, Shadow. My ultimate form, of ultimate power! Now, come."  
  
I hold my D-Tector, somehow knowing, it is the last time I shall ever spirit evolve..after this, there will be no need. My wings grow, as I change to Velgamon, and take to the air, hovering by Sigma. He looks at me again, and shakes his head.  
  
Sigma:"Shadow, Shadow, Shadow. That form, simply won't do. Combine your Spirits, Shadow. Concentrate."  
  
I close my eyes, slowly concentrating, I transform back to Jen, but do not fall..my D-Tector slowly glows, bright red, my spirits of darkness hover before me, and with a flash, they combine.  
  
"Fusion...Evolution"  
  
The combined spirits swirl around me, covering my body in shadows, I feel myself spirit evolving, changing, and then, the shadows suddenly explode, leaving me floating in midair. Huge dragon-like wings flair out, casting a dark shadow on the clouds, my enter body is covered in dark metallic-like armor. Blood red spikes adorn my shoulders and back. A razor sharp dark gray blade run down the enter length of both my arms. A faintly glowing, blood red sword floats in front of me. I grasp it, raising it to the dawns light.  
  
"Grendlemon.."  
  
Sigma laughs.  
  
Sigma:"Shadow, yes. Now, we are truly ready."  
  
He turns to the platform, floating below us, his eyes glow, and the platform transforms to a glowing orb.  
  
Sigma:"Focus your energy toward the chaos orb, Shadow. Once it is fully powered, by both of us, it will explode, destroying this world! And you, will be reborn.."  
  
Sigma's eyes grow brighter, he lowers his arms, the cannons, and weapons on both glowing, shooting energy down at the orb, it sparks, and slowly grows. I look down upon it, strange that such a small thing, could destroy a world. But..It was my salvation. I lower my sword, and a blood red rain of energy streaks from it, hitting the orb, making it grow even more.  
  
Sigma:"Keep it up, Shadow. It won't be to long now."  
  
My eyes stay on the orb, faint thoughts cross my mind. Is this the way.. but of coarse it is. It has to be. I must be reborn, or I will eternally suffer.. I cannot endure such pain forever. I wish to be free.  
  
"Free."  
  
~Free, Jen? Really?~  
  
My head bolts up, I look around. I see nothing but Sigma, but the sky, but the glowing orb. And Sigma, seems not to heard that at all. My imagination, thats all. I grit my teeth, ignoring it.  
  
~I am not your imagination, Jen. Listen, and you will recognize my voice. Only you, can here me.~  
  
I grow softly..Yes. I do recognize it. Dave. How did he get in my head.   
  
~Shut up. Leave ME ALONE!~  
  
~Dave: Jen. I cannot. What you are doing is wrong. Do you not care, anymore? Even..Just a little? Has the darkness, consumed you, that much?~  
  
~What does it mater? You will die, as will everyone else in this world! I don't CARE NO MORE!~  
  
~Dave:"You do, deep inside, its faint, fading, lost to the darkness. You must remember, how you felt for this world, once, Jen. For your friends.~  
  
I continue to attack the orb with my energy, trying to ignore his voice. It does not mater, he will not sway me. I MUST be rid of pain!  
  
~Dave:"How can you rid yourself of pain, by causing even more?~  
  
~It eases mine. And soon, I will feel nothing at all.~  
  
~Dave:"Sigma. HES using you. He needs a DigiDesteined for his spell to be complete. For it to work! Do you REALLY believe he will give you what you desire? He will just destroy you!~  
  
~You don't know that. And I do not care, anymore.~  
  
~Dave:"I sense your doubts, don't push them away.~  
  
~Why don't you stop us, then? Doubts, are irrelevant. All I care about, is ridding myself of these emotions.~  
  
~Dave:"Jen. We can't. We can't stop Sigma. We can't even reach were you are. He prevents that. Only you can stop this. And Jen, by ridding yourself of pain, of emotions, you will rid yourself of your very SOUL!~  
  
~I don't care. I rather not have it. Nightmares..is all that results.~  
  
~Dave:"Jen. You protected this world once. You sacrificed and fought so hard for it. Why turn your back on it, on your friends?~  
  
~This world turned its back on me, long ago. It rewarded my service, with pain. With suffering, never-ending.~  
  
~Dave:"JEN! It does NOT have to be this way, LET US HELP YOU!~  
  
I narrow my eyes,not answering. His words, mean nothing to me now. All I feel is numbness for them. They touch, not a single part of my soul.  
  
~Dave:"Jen. I see. You leave me no choice. I wished to try and reach you, not resort to this. I'm sorry.~  
  
I growl softly, what was he talking about? He said himself, they could not stop Sigma, they could not even come close to us. Empty threats.  
  
Sigma:"Shadow. You are becoming distracted. Focus."  
  
I focus my eyes, back on the orb, its size, has more then tripled in size. Sparks fly from it, and a strange blackish energy circles around it. I stare at it, soon, soon.. But then, a streak of white hot pain pierces my head. I struggle to keep my focus, but everything goes black, then flashes a blinding white. 


	17. Chapter 17Shinning Light, Possibility's ...

Chapter 17-Shinning Light, Possibility's Seen.  
  
I slowly open my eyes, flinching. Light..so bright. White, as far as I can see. Where am I? I growl softly. I must get out of here, I must help Sigma finish. I must!  
  
~Jen.~  
  
I turn my head, and he is standing to the side. Dave. I growl softly. What is this, some vain attempt to reach me? It won't work. I told him this. I showed everyone this. I spring at him, swinging my sword, it passes, straight though him. I howl in anger.  
  
"YOU! How many times MUST I TELL YOU?? I DO NOT CARE LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!"  
  
Dave:"I can't. I won't. YOU have done much evil, and have much to answer for, Jen."  
  
I growl softly, looking for a way out.  
  
Dave:"This is your own mind, part of it, Jen. There is no escape, until what we have done, is done with."  
  
"What you...have done? What does it mater. YOU can't reach me. No one can. I am of the shadows, I wish to be!"  
  
Dave:"What you wish, does not mater anymore. That is taken out of your hands now."  
  
I hiss again.  
  
"I will DO what I want, you won't stop me!"  
  
Dave:"We will. No mater what. Even if the only way, is this. Revel, Possibility's. Roads not taken. You will see, what you could of been.  
  
His eyes gaze at mine, strong, yet sad, angry. He turns his back on me, and fades into the brightness. I hiss..and then suddenly it is as my mind explodes. Images flash, faster and faster, I can't even make them out.  
  
"W....What the Hell??"  
  
I fall to my knees, barely noticing I have reverted to Jen, my hands clutch my head. The pain.. so intense.  
  
~Partner...~  
  
I look up, Vegeta, no its just a memory!  
  
"Go away! I don't care about you anymore, your dead!!"  
  
But a part of me..still does, as much as I deny, part of me, does.  
  
Vegeta's form shimmers, and vanishes, flashes of color streak all around me, then stop, and form right in front of me. I stare and slowly stand up, staring..as the energy forms.. me? I stand up, slowly approaching her. What trick was this?  
  
"Your..Just a figment.."  
  
She looks at me, and I notice, her eyes are so much different them mine. Reflected in them, I see no hatred, no anger, no pain. Instead, there is a quiet calmness, and deep strength. She reaches to me, her hand stopping midway.  
  
LightJen:"Jen..."  
  
More flashes streak past, forming another figure, by the strange, calm Jen. This figure only slightly looks like me. The differences between her, and the other Jen, are startling. Her eyes, are a blood red. Reflected in them is a cold hatred, anger, and something more.. something I have only seen reflected in the eyes of demons. She unfolds a pair of black bat-like wings, adorned with blood red spikes. She hisses, showing razor sharp fangs. Her fingers flex, silverish claws glimmer. Faint scale marks grace her hands, and face. Dark armor adorns her frame.   
  
DarkJen:"Jen..."  
  
I stare at both of them. Was this some sort of trick?  
  
The DarkJen hisses at me.  
  
DarkJen:"Trick? I am what you will soon become."  
  
She grins at me, her eyes flash, and the world spins around us. I find myself, floating high above the Digital World. as I look down, a huge flash of blood red light explodes, I see the Digital World's very data shatter, and it seems as if the world itself screams, as it dies. I see Sigma, and ...myself...Grendalmon . Sigma's laughing, the destruction seems not to touch him, or ..me. The Grendalmon below, suddenly screams, reverting back to Jen.. a strange glow surrounds her, the screams she utters.. are unlike any I have ever heard. When it fades, The Dark Jen is hovering.   
  
DarkJen:"Our rebirth..Most painful. But Worth it."  
  
Another flash, and this time we are floating above the Real World, one of the city's. I see Dark Jen below, flying.. Slaughtering people. Shes laughing, the sound.. so sadistic, so cold. She enjoys what she's doing.  
  
More flashes, more worlds, death.. even the destruction of entire worlds. I see DarkJen, and Sigma, move across countless worlds, for countless times, slaughtering all in their path. No one seems able to stop them.  
  
The images slowly fade, I shake, ever so slightly, as the whiteness replaces the horrific images. I look at DarkJen.  
  
"My future?"  
  
DarkJen:"Possible future. What you will become. Glorious, is it not? The utter pleasure of killing. Oh the screams. No pain, no fear, no doubt, no stupid human emotions."  
  
She grins again.  
  
DarkJen:"Eternal pleasure of destruction, by Sigma's side. Picture it. Its everything you've dreamed of. Everything you've hoped for. End of pain, for you, anyway. And suffering, for all those happy freaks. The FUN I and Sigma have!"  
  
She laughs, the sound somehow chills me, but why? This is what I seek to become. I seek to be her. To not be human..shes a demon. Is that not what I want? That is why I killed my friends, why I am helping Sigma destroy the entire world! But...This Dark Jen, was so different then me.."  
  
Dark Jen:"Don't be silly. You want to be different. You hate what you are now. Embrace it!"  
  
The LightJen frowns softly, then moves one step closer to me. She does not speak, mearly looks at me, for long moments. The flashes of light start again. I find myself, floating over a green field. Below me, is LightJen. In front of her, is a strange women, part of her, metal. Cyborg?  
  
The women moves her hands, razor sharp claws streak out, about a foot in length. She charges at LightJen. LightJen takes out a D-Tector, Spirit Evolving..but into what? When the lights fade, Zephyrmon stands before the cyborg. I look, in shock. Wind? Light Spirit...  
  
Zephyrmon leaps into the air, the two fight, viciously, but I see the Cyborg is fighting out of anger, but Zephyrmon..She is calm.   
  
More flashes, more images. I see LightJen, with her friends, fighting darkness. But no anger, or hatred crosses her heart. Then I see Sigma. Jen standing before him, challenging his evil. More flashes, I see Dave, and Sigma fighting. Someplace were no one can reach. Sigma ..destroys Dave. I see Jen flinch, in pain, she starts to..cry. I see..love in her eyes? But I also see strength..how can this be? To loose one you love, and not be driven to darkness? How can she be THAT strong?  
  
LightJen:"People depend on me. I can help them. I can fight darkness, I will not surrender."  
  
The images fade, leaving the white again.  
  
LightJen:"What you could of been. Had you not fallen to darkness."  
  
Her eyes, so sad.  
  
LightJen:"It is to late, for that possibility. But its not to late, to stop the possibility, DarkJen, represents."  
  
DarkJen:"Stop it? Its to late! You ARE darkness."  
  
The DarkJen approaches me, putting her claws to my face. Her hand feels so cold.  
  
DarkJen:"Come on now. No doubts, remember? Soon, no pain. And you will be stronger, then you could ever dream of. No one will make you feel pain again."  
  
LightJen:"Jen. If you had been light, you would of been stronger then darkness. Your true strength, lies in the light."  
  
The DarkJen snaps at the LightJen.  
  
DarkJen:"As does suffering."  
  
LightJen:"Only if you let the pain take hold."  
  
DarkJen holds out her hand, to be.  
  
DarkJen:"Take my hand. Come on. You know its your path. Shadows, so warm."  
  
LightJen also holds out her hand.  
  
LightJen:"There is still chance, to stop the death of the Digital World. Do not let, them die."  
  
I growl.  
  
"You lie. My path is darkness, NOT light."  
  
I slowly reach, for the DarkJen's hand, the LightJen lowers her eyes, her form slowly fading away. The DarkJen laughs, but suddenly, LightJen's head bolts up.  
  
LightJen:"Wait. One last thing to show you."  
  
Once again lights flash, and I see LightJen, collapsed on the ground, leaning against a rock. She stares up at Sigma, but this Sigma is different..it lacks the evil of Bai Zair. Slowly Sigma raises his hand, a glowing DigiCore appears.. and data streaks out, forming into a mighty Megidramon. Vegeta.. I see LightJen run to him, embracing. Vegeta...  
  
The images fade, slowly.  
  
"VEGETA!!!!!"  
  
LightJen:"Sigma aways had the power to revive him. He was using you. Using your pain. Jen..."  
  
I close my eyes, sinking to my knees. Vegeta.. The images, of all I had done, all the life I had taken, flash before my eyes. I slowly start to cry, the darkness around my heart, slowly cracking. But it was to late, I feel it. I was to far gone. Saving.. I really was beyond saving. But not because of Vegeta's death..but because of my own actions. Because I refused to heal, refused to let my friends help me. I cast myself in darkness, in pain.   
  
"What..Have I done??"  
  
LightJen:"Still time. Not to save yourself, but to save the others. Who is left."  
  
DarkJen:"NO! DON"T BE a fool, Vegeta does not mater, he never did. Just some stupid piece of data. Better off dead."  
  
I bolt up, staring at DarkJen. This was NOT me. I could..I loved Vegeta. How could I ..I almost threw that away.. I reach out, and take LightJen's hand. The whiteness glows, brighter and brighter, blinding me.  
  
When it fades, I find myself once again above the Digital World, by Sigma. The Orb is huge.   
  
Sigma;"Almost time, Shadow."  
  
I growl softly. What I almost did..I look at Sigma, then the Orb. I know there is no saving me. I have done, horrible things, that I finally now saw as the horror they really were. I corrupted myself, I let myself fall. I softly whisper.  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
Sigma's head jerks up.  
  
Sigma:"What Shadow?"  
  
I look at him, then dive, under the orb. I raise my sword.  
  
Sigma:"Shadow, what are you doing??"  
  
I do not answer, I cannot. What I almost did.. I swing my sword, hitting the orb, huge flashes shoot out, and with all my power I fly up, and slam into it. The orb fluctuates, Sigma's eyes grow larger, and then, the orb explodes.  
  
Sigma:"NO! SHADOW WHAT HAVE YOU...."  
  
He screams, as his very structure is broken down, destroyed. And I feel my own self, being destroyed. But the Digital World.. Is safe. I know this, This is the end, but only for Sigma, only for me. I close my eyes.  
  
"I...am sorry.."  
  
The energy consumes me, destroys me. And Jen, is no more.  
  
The End. 


End file.
